Skip to main content

It’s a difficult experience that no one wants to face, however, one that will touch nearly everyone at one point or another in our lives. If you are currently dealing with the end of a relationship, know that you are not alone – You can make it through this rough patch!

The process of recovering from a broken heart is going to look a little different for everyone, however, there are some common steps that one can take to help work through this. I’m not going to lie – this is going to be difficult, it’s going to hurt, but you can come out stronger than ever before. You’ve got this!

Here are 7 important things that you need to keep in mind following a break-up:

#1 – Emotions are only relieved by feeling them.

Unfortunately, there is no big secret to releasing our hurt and pain from our lives. Emotions demand to be felt. Rather than trying to bury these feelings away, which will only result in them festering and continuing to hurt you for weeks, months or years to come, allow yourself to work through them. Take a step away from your life and give yourself permission to fall apart. Feel the pain, and as you work through it you will be able to let it go once and for all. Remember, healing is a process and it takes time.

#2 – You are worthy of love.

Sometimes, following a painful breakup, we may struggle to find an explanation. This can cause us to look at ourselves in a very harsh light, blaming our flaws or weaknesses for leading to our partner walking away. Over time, this can start to erode our self-esteem and feelings of self-worth, leading us to question whether we were worthy of love, to begin with. Try to remind yourself that relationships end for many different reasons, some as simple as the fact that not all personalities are going to click. This isn’t an indication that there is something wrong with you, merely that this isn’t the person you are meant to spend your life with.

#3 – Stop trying to ‘fill the void’ this breakup caused.

Yes, you likely feel as though there is something missing, a ‘void’ in your life that was previously filled by your partner. While you can’t eliminate this feeling entirely, after all, you are experiencing a loss, be careful how you choose to deal with it. Filling this void with alcohol, junk food, partying or other destructive choices will only make the situation worse. Instead, choose positive coping mechanisms like engaging in meditation or spending time outdoors. This is your opportunity to engage in some positive self-care, ensuring your mental and emotional health aren’t forgotten.

#4 – You don’t have to do this alone.

One feeling that many people struggle with following a break-up is the idea that you are now completely alone. However, if you take a step back from the pain for a moment and look around, you will realize the exact opposite is true. You have friends and family that would love nothing more than to be there for you during your time of need. You simply have to open up and let them in.

#5 – The pain you are feeling is real.

There is no denying the fact that there is going to be emotional pain following a breakup, but you may also be experiencing physical pain. No, you’re not crazy – this pain is very real, and it could very well be caused by the news you recently received. Studies confirm that our body may actually react to a break up in a very real physical way, with symptoms including shortness of breath and chest pain. Otherwise known as ‘broken heart syndrome’, it has even been suspected of causing death in more extreme cases.

#6 – Don’t forget to love yourself.

Love from others will bring you happiness, sure – I would be lying if I said it doesn’t. However, if that’s the only love that you have then something will always be missing in your life. It’s never enough. At the end of the day, the most important thing that you can learn is to genuinely love yourself. Unconditionally love yourself. Don’t allow others to tell you that this is selfish or wrong in some way. Take the love you once shared with your partner and turn it back on yourself.

#7 – This is an opportunity for a fresh start.

Sure, this is a painful and difficult time, but maybe it’s also an opportunity. With the ending of a relationship, you are starting a new chapter in your life. Take a moment to reflect on your life, are there areas that you would like to change in any way? Maybe you’ve always wanted to try a specific hobby but never previously had time – this is your chance. Find things that bring you joy and make a point of introducing them into your life at every turn. You are picking up the pieces and rebuilding your life, so why not build one that will make you happy?

Image via P.S I Love You