Skip to main content

The world of dating can be so incredibly difficult, like navigating a minefield, always actively trying to make your way through life without it blowing up in your face. While there is no way to avoid heartbreak or failed relationships, there are signs you can watch for to let you know you’ve found a ‘keeper’.

Is the woman in your life a diamond in the rough, a once in a lifetime kind of person? If so, this is a woman you should hold onto, fight for and never let go. Take a step back and look at your relationship today. Does she feel like ‘the one’? Let’s break it down a little further…

Here are 18 signs that you’ve found a woman worth your effort:

#1 – She shows you respect.

Respect is a necessary building block for a healthy, lasting relationship. Pay attention to how she treats you, especially if you are currently disagreeing about something. Does she attack you or degrade you, or does she treat you with respect? Mutual respect is essential, or the relationship is destined to fail.

#2 – She has her life sorted out.

This doesn’t necessarily mean that everything is perfect, or that she has all the answers. She has goals in her life, and she is working towards them. Her life has some sense of order, even when things get challenging, and she’s got a clear understanding of responsibility. Starting a life with her isn’t stepping into a mess that you have to clean up to keep it all from crashing down.

#3 – She radiates positivity.

We live in a toxic, negative world, and don’t need to introduce more negativity into the mix. When she’s around, does she bring a smile to your face? If she is introducing a positive light, bringing you joy and happiness, this will influence your life in a great way. However, if she is a carrier of negative energy, you will be better off steering clear.

#4 – She has her own life.

While you want to build a life together, you don’t want to be overly dependent on one another. Instead, the most successful relationships involve two people that maintain their own individual lives. Two complete, happy people who complement one another in some way.

#5 – She doesn’t talk down to you.

We all have our flaws and weaknesses, but she doesn’t use them to belittle you or treat you like lesser in any way. When you break this down, it’s about trust. Can you trust her not to use your mistakes as a weapon against you?

#6 – She loves you for you.

When she talks about your future together or mentions the aspects about you that she loves, they aren’t built on what she can turn you into or your potential for who you ‘may be’ someday down the road. She loves you for who you are, including your quirks and flaws.

#7 – She gives you space from time to time.

As we previously discussed, a healthy relationship includes time together as well as maintaining your own lives, but does she give you the space necessary to make this happen? If she’s okay with you spending time ‘with the guys’, respecting your space, this is the sign of a healthy, balanced relationship.

#8 – She is willing to initiate.

There are plenty of women hanging back, hoping that a man is going to put himself out there and take that first vulnerable step. However, if you find a woman with the confidence to take that step, whether it’s moving in for the first kiss or asking for the first date, then she’s definitely someone you want to hold onto! This is a woman who knows what she wants and is willing to do whatever necessary to get it.

#9 – She trusts you.

If there is one thing that is absolutely in a healthy relationship, it’s mutual trust. Pay attention to whether she opens up to you and if she’s willing to be vulnerable. Does she trust you or does she shut you out? If she trusts you with even the darker side of her life, then this relationship has a solid foundation.

#10 – She is fun (and fair) in the bedroom.

While sex obviously isn’t the only thing that is important in a relationship, it is important to note that sex plays a crucial part in a healthy, lasting connection. If you have found a woman who is a lot of fun in the bedroom, and who doesn’t expect you to do all the work, then this is the makings of a healthy sex life for years to come.

#11 – She doesn’t compare you to others.

This life can be hard enough already, you don’t need someone constantly comparing you to everyone else around you. This includes not avoiding comparing you to celebrities, neighbors, coworkers and, arguably the most important, her exes.

#12 – She genuinely appreciates you.

When you do something for her she doesn’t just take it for granted. From the smaller efforts, like making her morning coffee just the way you like it, to the bigger things like taking you to dinner at your favorite restaurant. She notices that you put effort into your relationship, and she shows that she appreciates it.

#13 – She makes every experience fun.

If you’re in a relationship with someone that is truly going to make your life better, even the silliest experiences are fun when you’re together. Does she make you laugh about going to the grocery store or turn housework into a game that you can share with one another? Having fun with another each and every day will help to keep the spark alive.

#14 – She shows that she genuinely cares.

Pay attention to how a woman acts when she’s around you. Does she show you courtesy and compassion? There are many women that will use you, leverage you and focus on their own agenda. If she expresses her feelings for you and shows that she actually cares, take note.

#15 – She respects her own body.

Sure, she may not always love her body, especially as she goes and changes through life. However, she respects her body and all that it can do. As such, she makes an effort to take care of it, paying attention to what she’s eating and staying physically active.

#16 – She is proud of you.

She is genuinely proud of your accomplishments, and she goes out of her way to tell you. Not only is she proud to your face, she shares your accomplishments with anyone that will listen to her, including friends, family, and even complete strangers. This shows that she has a significant interest in you, and your goals and dreams.

#17 – She lets you ‘do you’.

Even if she doesn’t share the same thoughts our outlook, she allows you to embrace who you are, and act the way that makes you the most comfortable in this life. If that means taking a Saturday off to play video games once in a while, she will give you the space to do so (as long as you continue to maintain some balance between your fun and your responsibilities).

#18 – She makes a serious effort to listen to you.

There is a distinct difference between surface level listening, and actively listening to what you’re saying. When you are sharing something with her she doesn’t just wait for her opportunity to speak, she pays careful attention to what you are telling her, remembering the details of your conversations for future reference. She values your opinion and is willing to provide advice if necessary.

Image via BDF Jade