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It took me a long time to understand that just because someone says they love you and just because they continue to choose to be in your life, does not mean that they love you. The words that are spoken from someone’s mouth don’t matter at all, at the end of the day, and people treat you differently when they do not love you.

The thing is, people, show you that they love you when they do. They do not always leave you guessing as to how they feel. They do not play games with you. On the contrary, they show you all the time that you matter. This can be a hard thing to understand, especially if you grew up in a toxic family dynamic because you have always been accustomed to uncertainty and love going hand in hand. However, that is not what love looks like.

When someone does not love you, they may not say it, but they will show you. They will show you how they treat you. If someone loves you, they will show up for you. They won’t make excuses. Someone who does not love you will not prioritize you. You will have to beg for consideration, communication, and respect.

Someone who does not love you will talk down to you. They will refuse to commit, and they will not care to fix the things that bother you. When someone doesn’t love you, you will find yourself trying to make excuses for their behavior. However, at the end of the day, there is no excuse for such behavior. The only excuse is that they don’t love you and that you deserve better.

You may be saying, “But they need time,” or “They are different, they are just struggling.” And if that is okay with you, then live your life. However, when someone loves you, they will show it. They will never, ever make you question where you stand with them, even on their worst day. Someone who does not love you will always make you question yourself.