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When it comes to love a lot of us expect far more from our partners than we should or make out what we have as something more than it is. Sometimes we find ourselves overly attached to people who just aren’t with us for the right reasons.

Whether your relationship is a positive one or a negative one the things your lover does can reveal more than you would imagine. If you’re reading this you are most likely wondering if your partner is with you because he or she loves you or because he or she is comfortable and afraid of moving forward on his or her own. Below I am going to go over some of the signs that will help you to figure that out. If you happen to find that your partner is only with you because he or she is settling, perhaps you cutting ties is a good option.

9 Signs That Your Partner Is Settling And Doesn’t Really Love You:

1. You cannot be yourself/express yourself.

When your partner is with you for his or her own reasons outside of love, they won’t allow you to be yourself. They will push you to be who they want you to be and force you into a box. In some cases, you will feel very on edge and just unable to really open up in the ways you should be able to.

2. You just don’t have much in common.

If the person you’re with is not with you for the right reasons you most likely won’t have much in common. He or she will stick by you for the sake of being with someone rather than getting to know someone and really spending time on hobbies and having fun. It just won’t be the way it would be if you were in a healthy relationship, point-blank.

3. You’re both stuck in a routine that you cannot break free from.

It feels like every day even though you’re both unhappy you find yourself going through the motions. No one is questioning anything in the ways they should be, and you’re just ‘there.’ When this happens if one person doesn’t stand up at some point things will continue on forever.

4. They’re rarely ever on ‘your side.’

If someone is merely settling for us in our relationship they won’t care to be on our side. They will pick fights and argue with us because they know we’re not going anywhere anyway. They don’t want to make things work properly, just enough for them to get what they need out of the ‘connection.’

5. They are focused more on physical intimacy than emotional.

When someone we are with is only with us because they want to be in a relationship they won’t want to be with us on that emotional level. They will be more-so physical with you than anything. If you cut that off, there won’t be any intimacy at all.

6. They are not interested in helping you grow as a person.

The person we’re with is supposed to help us grow in the ways we help them grow. Couples who remain stagnant never truly move forward they are stuck in limbo. If your partner really wanted to be with you on a deeper level, he or she would push you to be the best possible version of yourself.

7. They always seem bored when they’re with you.

Your lover should never seem frustrated at having to spend time with you. You two should be on the same page and willing to try new things. When he or she is bored but refuses to deviate from the routine you should know that something is up.

8. They do not put much effort into things.

People who know we won’t leave tend to stop putting forth effort. They don’t take the time to do the small things that won you over, to begin with. It’s like helping you out is an impossible task for them.

9. You do not feel important within the relationship.

If you don’t feel important in your relationship then things need to change. Your partner should always make sure you are content and that everyone has their needs met. This is not something you should ever be willing to budge on.