The other day, I was scrolling through my social media, and I saw a reel in which a woman was giving relationship advice to someone who was asking about her ex. What stuck out to me, was that this woman who was giving advice didn’t ask any type of probing questions about the situation before shutting the woman down by saying, “if he’s your ex, then he belongs in your past.”
Something about this immediately gave me a gross feeling in my stomach. The vibe this was giving was very close-minded at best. What I wanted to say was, “How dare you to assume anything about this person’s doubts about breaking it off with their ex.” Just because someone is an ex doesn’t mean that they should be written off entirely.
We all make mistakes. For example, let’s say that Lucy, in the heat of an angry moment, decides to break it off with her ex. She says he doesn’t invest enough time in the relationship, so it isn’t working, so why even keep trying? Later, she thinks about things and realizes that while he hasn’t been attentive lately, he was in the past, and she then begins to realize that he has a lot going on in his life and that maybe she could have been more supportive of him. So, she reaches out, they reconnect, work through the rough patch, and spend their lives together.
This might sound like a fairy tale, but it happens more often than you think.
Now, with that being said, I am NOT saying to cling to someone who is a lost cause. What I am saying, is that we all have difficult moments, and we all make mistakes. So, before you let someone write off your ex entirely, perhaps you should listen to your own gut. Why? Because the choice to break up isn’t always the best one, and deep down, you are the only one who knows what is best for you.