Borderline Personality Disorder is something that seems to be more prominent than most realize and while some people are diagnosed with it, those who are higher-functioning with it may not even end up getting their mental health evaluated at all to be diagnosed in the first place or even may face a misdiagnosis. This kind of thing does not affect all with it in the same ways, and we all need to be aware of that.
In recent years mental health awareness has become more and more talked about in the world and that’s a good thing but with it also comes a lot of misconceptions. One of the things I’ve noticed is that those with BPD tend to get a bad reputation without even lashing out or showing that side of themselves which is quite saddening. We shouldn’t be judging others based on their diagnosis.
For those who might not be aware BPD is as noted above a mental health issue those with it tend to have quite varying moods and serious ups and downs. They usually struggle with their self-image big time and can be pretty impulsive. A lot of people with it are pretty self-destructive and usually struggle with feelings of chronic emptiness and well, their anger is quite explosive.
All of that having been said, not everyone with BPD has it as severely as some do. You could have BPD and not lash out with explosive anger, we are all unique in how our mental health issues affect us. Some of us are better at managing things than the rest of us are and that’s just life.
Psychology Today wrote as follows about high-functioning BPD or ‘Quiet BPD’ as some call it:
Stereotypically, a person with BPD exhibits symptoms such as anger outbursts, irrational accusations of others, and self-destructive impulsive behavior. In the case of Quiet BPD, these things become invisible because the volatility is directed inward rather than out.
If you have Quiet BPD, you “act in.” You experience the entire gamut of emotions — fear of rejection, mood swings, rage, obsessive emotional attachment, self-doubt, anxiety, etc. However, you do not show your inner turmoil on the outside. Instead of lashing out, you direct the anger, hate, and blame toward yourself.
Trauma psychotherapist Pete Walker described four of our basic defensive structures: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn. Most of us employ all of these strategies, depending on the situation. If you have Quiet BPD, your predominant coping mechanism is freeze.
If you’re feeling pretty out of whack and unable to pinpoint what you’re facing, high-functioning BPD might be something you should look into and get assessed by a professional. If you’re going through mood swings that last for just a few hours or days, tend to feel guilty or shameful often, and face a lot of numbness you could be dealing with high-functioning BPD. Just because you can act normally and hide the things going on within doesn’t mean you’re fine.
You may feel like you’re a burden, struggle with detachment, stress over rejection, and other things of the sort. These are not things we should be feeling on extreme levels normally. They all signify a serious underlying issue. While you might not want to see someone to get a proper diagnosis doing-so will help you in the long-run. Managing this kind of thing is possible and could change your life.