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A lot of us have gone through some rough breakups but have they been rough for reasons we didn’t understand? Were you struggling with still being in love with that person or did you just miss him/her in ways you didn’t think you would?

While not a lot of people realize it, there is a difference between still loving someone and simply missing their presence in your life because you were comfortable with them. Sometimes we end up being alone long after love has died down and at that point coming to that realization is important. If you don’t know whether you’re still in love with someone then perhaps you need to do some searching within before you even consider trying to find that sense of love again.

Sure, you might think of this person when it’s late and you’re all alone but do you think of him or her when you’ve accomplished something or when you’re looking for someone to confide in? Are you really still in love with him/her or do you just want someone to show you affection and miss the way that they were able to make you smile? I know, this kind of thing is confusing but working through it can and will help more than you know.

If you don’t think of them when you’re at your best, then they probably aren’t someone you want in your life anymore even if you miss the way things once were. Sure, it’s alright to miss someone but it’s not alright to convince yourself that you still love them just because on occasion your mind runs to that familiarity because you’re struggling as a whole. You’ll find someone new when you’re ready and letting this sink in will help push you down that path.

I know, it’s hard to forget someone who was so important to you for so long but sometimes that’s necessary and you need to remember that above all else. If this person hurts you then they don’t deserve your love anyway. Sure, you’ll miss this person from time to time and there will be moments where you find yourself reminiscing of when you were together but that doesn’t mean this person still owns your heart.

Knowing where your heart is doesn’t take as much effort as you might think. It’s easier to figure out than most realize. You’re going to be just fine, don’t forget that. You can miss him or her in the middle of the night after a long day but that in itself shouldn’t be enough to force you back into a toxic situation. You’re stronger than that and you need to do what’s best for you.