While it might sound a bit odd, there are some people in this world who do go out of their way to please their narcissists. Pleasing a narcissist might be complicated and hard but it is do-able, but at what cost?
When you work hard to make the narcissist happy, you may accomplish that but you’re also focusing only on the narcissist and letting your own wants or needs fall through the cracks. Instead of calling him/her out on their bullshit you’re biting your tongue and bearing the load of the things they force on you without hesitation. This in itself takes a serious toll on you whether you want to admit it or not.
You might want to make your narcissist happy but you shouldn’t be putting your own wellbeing at risk in order to do-so. You don’t have to wait around for him/her all the time and you shouldn’t be letting them essentially ruin your life. While you’re attached and might not know how to get by without your narcissist I can assure you it is possible and you are strong enough to manage exactly that.
A lot of the time narcissists seem to prey on people who are what we would consider as ‘people pleaser.’ People pleasers for those who do not know are those who feel the need to do whatever it takes to please the people around them. They will pretend to be someone they’re not and really go out of their way to try and fit in. You see, while narcissists seem to think of no one but themselves, people pleasers rarely think of themselves and almost always have other people on their minds.
The people-pleaser will feel like they’re really doing something good by trying their hardest to make life easier on the narcissist even though the narcissist is not doing anything of the sort for them in return. This in itself if nothing else should serve as a warning for all to try and be aware of the things you’re getting in return for your services. If you’re giving someone your all, and they are not willing to give anything back in the end, they’re probably not worth your time or efforts as a whole.
Narcissists are really good with their words so reeling people back in is nothing to them. They are sometimes easier to get along with, sure but the truth is going out of our way to make them happy is doing serious harm to us in the long-run. We all need to learn our worth and know what we should and should not tolerate in life and perhaps even in love.