Selfless love is a beautiful thing but it’s also a painful thing. When you love others selflessly and do not think of yourself or your own needs the wrong person could hurt you big time.

Sadly in this day and age far too often we fall in love with people who don’t see us as we are. Whether you’re in a healthy relationship or trying to get out of a toxic one, being selfish is important. While that might sound a bit odd, let me explain. Being selfish on a small level allows you to maintain your freedom in the sense that you stay as a priority.

When you dive into a relationship head first without being a bit selfish throughout, you forget to take care of yourself and you allow your own needs to fall through the cracks because you become so overwhelmingly infatuated with this other person. Instead of being over the top and trying to please the person you’re with 24/7 just be yourself and hold that independence high. The right person will love you for you, not for the face you pretend is yours when you first meet.

If you want a proper relationship that functions well you need to make sure you’re not destroying yourself for love. You stay in the moment with this person and take things as they come. Instead of sucking up to your partner, you tell them how things are and you move forth on the same page.

If you’re a little selfish and your partner is a little selfish but you’re both willing to care for one another properly, things will flourish. I know that might sound odd but it’s love in the most proper form. You shouldn’t be putting so much into your partner that you think they’re the air you breathe. You are still you and you will still be you even if your partner happens to leave.

Being selfish in love doesn’t mean expecting your partner to bend to your will, it’s just making sure that you aren’t letting your happiness go just to make someone else happy. It’s ensuring that while your partner is happy, you too are happy. Being selfish first isn’t as bad of a thing as people make it out to be. Honestly, it’s kind of important.

People who too selfish are a problem but people who are only a little selfish are taking care of themselves properly. They are making sure that they’re able to keep going whether people are pulling them down or not. For a bit more insight on why selfishness isn’t as bad of a thing as people make it out to be, take a look at the video below.

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