While we have had some pretty good times together, you never really cared about me. You played with my heart and wasted my time but I don’t hate you for it.
Life goes on whether you’re by my side or not and that is something that I had to realize on my own once and for all. I know, it took me a very long time to finally see it but now that I have, I think I am stronger now for it. I didn’t leave because I didn’t care about you, I left because I wasn’t enough for you and you made that clearer than anyone else ever has.
You always made me feel like I was lacking, you beat me down and took every bad thing in your life out on me. All I wanted was to help you feel better and all you wanted was to leave me helpless. In the end, I couldn’t give you what it was you wanted, I had to take back my power and really give myself the forgiveness that I felt I deserved.
You always kept me on edge and left me wondering what I could do next to try and make things better. Nothing I ever did made any real kind of difference. You always looked down on me and loved seeing me saddened by your lies. You pretended to want me around when I was benefiting you but, that wasn’t something that could ever last forever.
I know in the end I did what I should have when I left and I know that things never would have worked, no matter how badly I wanted them to. If you had cared about me, things would not have been as they were. We would have been much less toxic from the start.
I am not afraid of you, and I am not going to retreat. I now know who I am and where I stand. This world is mine for the taking and I don’t need you either, I am so much stronger without you by my side. I can accomplish so much more than you ever thought I could.
Yes, sometimes I look back and I do miss you but I don’t miss the pain you put me through. I will cherish the few good memories I have with you but I would not go back to the connection we shared. We were not two people who were meant to stand the tests of time and that in itself is perfectly fine.