Dating is not an easy endeavor for all, and for the vast majority, it can be a daunting task. And while we all want to find the one and to settle down, be careful to not settle for less than you deserve.
We’ve all been there, we’ve been on a few dates with a few duds, and we begin to feel as though we are never going to find the one. Then, we meet someone who has a few compatible traits or characteristics, and we begin to wonder if we should just make this work, so we can be happy. The trouble with that is, that eventually, the initial chemistry of a connection begins to wane, and the only thing that matters is compatibility. And if you are only barely compatible, it simply isn’t going to work.
That might be a hard truth to face, but it’s important to remain honest with yourself, first and foremost.
Don’t ever settle for anything less than someone who exhibits the following 12 behaviors:
1. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t appreciate you.
If the person you are interested in doesn’t appreciate you or all of the little things that make you who you are, they aren’t for you. That may be hard to hear, but everyone deserves to be appreciated and accepted, especially by the person they want to be with.
2. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t share the same values as you.
A lot of times, when we are looking for a partner, we want someone who has a great job, who looks great, or who is smart but at the end of the day, having a partner that shares the same values as you is far more important. Beyond the initial chemistry, what makes a relationship work is compatibility. That means that you need to have a similar vision and outlook on life as this person, or else it isn’t likely to work.
3. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t respect you.
If someone disrespects you, they are showing you who they are. Believe them. Do not settle for them, do not give them the benefit of the doubt – instead, find someone who is respectful.
4. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t introduce you to their people.
Someone who truly loves you and truly wants to have a relationship with you is going to introduce you to the people they love. They will want you to be a part of their circle, and won’t isolate you are keep you separate from them. If they do, it’s better not to settle for this person, because they likely aren’t looking for a real relationship.
5. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t support you.
A healthy relationship is composed of two people who are rooting for each other. If your partner doesn’t support you or encourage you – they are not on your team. And teamwork is what a relationship is really about.
6. Don’t settle for someone who can’t be relied on.
It’s a bad situation to be in when your partner always says they are going to do this, or do that, but when it comes time, they never follow through. Yes, people sometimes fall short of expectations. However, if someone is always unreliable, they aren’t the right one.
7. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t want to commit.
When you ask them what they want from a relationship, and they are vague in their response or skirt around the question altogether, chances are, they aren’t ready to commit. And the unfortunate thing about this is that you could end up in a situationship that is on/off for years, waiting for a real commitment, and never end up with one. Be wary of a person who won’t discuss or even consider a commitment.
8. Don’t settle for someone who isn’t emotionally available.
A lot of times, people tell us or show us when they are emotionally unavailable. They may not come out and straight-up say it, but there are most definitely signs. And more likely than not, you can sense when someone is guarded and not open to an emotional connection. If you sense this in someone, do not settle for them.
9. Don’t settle for someone who can’t admit when they are wrong.
By the time we reach adulthood, we should be able to admit when we are wrong. When a person does something wrong and can never say “Hey, I am sorry, I really shouldn’t have done that,” they are not ready for a relationship.
10. Don’t settle for someone you can’t have fun with.
Life gets monotonous. And if you want to settle down with someone, settle down with someone who can make you laugh and someone you can have a good time with. Otherwise, it’s going to get boring.
11. Don’t settle for less than someone who truly makes you happy.
When you are with someone, and they make you smile and feel happier than you have ever felt before, that is a wonderful sign. But, if you are just settling out of loneliness, not because you’ve found your happiness, eventually, ‘good enough,’ is no longer going to cut it.
12. Don’t settle for less than someone who wants to grow with you.
Having a partner who wants to grow with you is so important. People change and that is okay, but if you change and your partner doesn’t grow with you, you are going to grow apart. Sometimes, that is okay too, but it can be avoided if you get clear on expectations and values first.