Our lives are like a constant roller-coaster, filled with incredible highs and heartbreaking lows. While there is no true way to prevent the struggles, challenges, and pain that life may bring your way, how you chose to handle these times can make or break your health and happiness.
We can’t always choose the circumstances that we will face in life if we could the world would be an incredibly different place. There will come times that you have to experience great heartbreak, life-altering pain and challenges so difficult that you will question your ability to handle them effectively. However, the one thing that you do have control over during these times is the way that you choose to face your day. Are you going to wake up feeling like the hopeless victim, or are you ready to take control of your life and your future?
Feeling broken? Reclaim your life with these 17 beautiful tips:
#1 – Pay attention to who you give access to your life.
If you want to see what kind of person you are going to be, take a look at the people you spend most of your time with. Far too often we overlook the impact that friends and family can have on our lives. If you surround yourself with people who tear you down or minimize your accomplishments, you will also see yourself in a lesser light. Meanwhile, if you surround yourself with winner and warriors, their positivity, motivation, and confidence will rub off on you.
#2 – Make self-care a priority.
This is a point that everyone should be applying to their lives, whether they are currently in a good place or struggling a little much like you. Scheduling little moments of self-care into your day can help you to improve your mood, boost your confidence and recharge your batteries. After all, we all know it’s far harder to face anything when we’re exhausted. Some simple ideas include a relaxing bath, curling up with your favorite book or making your favorite food for dinner.
#3 – Demonstrate compassion in all interactions with others.
Now that you are currently dealing with such a difficult time, you should have a better idea of what others around you may be going through. One way that you can help to put your own struggles into perspective is by actively living your life with a focus on being compassionate and caring to everyone that you meet. Be sensitivity to the fact that we all have our own struggles, and while they may not be the same, or they may even seem trivial to you, they are significant to the person that is currently living with them.
#4 – Choose to live your life with an ‘attitude of gratitude’.
Take a moment every day to stop and identify three things that you are truly grateful for in your life. Verbalize these things and set the rule that you have to find something new each and every day, no repeating! This may be incredibly difficult at first if it isn’t something that you are used to, but it will get easier in time if you stick with it. Eventually, you will notice that you are retraining yourself to see the good things in your life rather than focusing on the negativity.
#5 – Limit your time on social media.
While social media can be a great tool to connect us with friends and family around the globe, experts warn that there are a lot of ways that it can actually hurt your mental health. If you are already struggling with something, you don’t need to surround yourself with the many pointless arguments, negative news, or constant comparison. Set a time limit for your social media time or take this opportunity for a complete detox.
#6 – Stop referring to yourself as ‘broken’.
Yes, you may be dealing with some hard times right now, we’ve all been there at one time or another. However, dealing with a difficult time in no way defines who you are as a person. Your self-talk plays an incredibly important roll in the development of your self-esteem and confidence. If you are telling yourself that you are broken, in time you’re going to start to believe it. Instead, take a deep breath and allow yourself to start identifying your strengths and accomplishments, building yourself up to get through this.
#7 – Stop hating yourself.
This goes a little bit with the previous point but let’s take it a step further. Rather than just reworking your self-talk, let’s take a serious look at how you truly feel about yourself as a person. You should be a priority in your life, but this can be difficult if you view yourself in a negative light. Don’t just drop the labels, it’s time to address how you see yourself entirely. Learning to love yourself unconditionally isn’t easy, but it is the path to true happiness.
#8 – Shift the conversation by using positive affirmations.
One great tool for correcting your self-talk, and in turn changing the way that you see yourself on a daily basis, is the use of positive affirmations. These are short words or phrases that are designed to help you see yourself in a positive light. When writing your affirmations, focus on the present as if you have already hit your goals. “I am beautiful”, “I am successful”, “People respect me”, and “I have been recognized at work with a big promotion.” Are all examples. Repeat these phrases every morning looking in the mirror and internalize them. Believe them.
#9 – Take some time to get all the facts.
Are you a fact and data type of person? If so, don’t deny yourself the things that will help you to move forward in your current situation. Sit down and take some time to do the research, arming yourself with the facts that you crave. If you are unhappy with your job, research your options. Did you just leave a long-term relationship? Take the time to discover how a breakup can actually impact your life physically, mentally and emotionally. Understanding all of this can help you to put things into perspective and make a solid plan for the best way to move forward.
#10 – Make it a priority to serve other people.
Instead of wallowing in your pity, take time out of your day to focus on helping others. Step back for a moment and consider what causes speak to your heart, and then search for opportunities to volunteer your time. For example, are you a huge animal lover? Most animal shelters and rescues are hurting for volunteers to help care for the animals in their care. This will not only put your own struggles in perspective, but it will bring you joy knowing that you are making a difference.
#11 – Ensure that you’re getting a good night’s sleep.
Don’t overlook the incredible importance of a good night’s sleep in order to heal and move forward during challenging times. We live in such a busy, fast-paced society that we often overlook the need to shut down and allow your minds to heal. Don’t make this mistake. Schedule your sleep time into your schedule the same way that you would work or a doctor’s appointment and stick to it.
#12 – Make a list of bad habits that you should break.
We spend far too much time looking at the big decisions and actions in our lives while overlooking the little habits each and every day, however, these little decisions add up over time. It can be intimidating to make major changes in your life, so why not start with the little things? Sit down and make a list of the daily habits that may be holding you back or preventing your happiness, then start picking away at them one by one. This may seem small, but just wait… You’ll be surprised how big the impact will be over time.
#13 – Practice mindfulness on an ongoing basis.
The past is behind you, and there is nothing you can do to change it. At the same time, the future is out of your hands meaning that extreme worrying is essentially an act of futility. Instead, make an effort to refocus your time and energy on the here and now. This is the one moment in time where you can truly make a difference. Plus, by practicing mindfulness, you are more likely to stop and enjoy the little moments worthy of celebrating each day.
#14 – Embrace the idea that life doesn’t have to be perfect to be great.
For some reason, we have created an ‘all or nothing’ way of thinking when it comes to our lives in today’s society. They are either perfect in every way, or they simply aren’t’ good enough. Rather than looking at your life in such a critical way, setting yourself up for failure, start looking at your life for how amazing it is here and now! Sure, it could always get better, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the many amazing aspects of it now.
#15 – Consider getting a sponsor.
This is a technique that is often used for the treatment of addiction-related problems, but the theory can be extended to other struggles and areas of our lives. Find someone in your life that you can genuinely trust, such as a good friend, family member or your therapist, and share your goals with them. Ask them to hold you accountable from week to week. As we suggested earlier, focus your goals on your daily habits, making them smaller and more attainable. This will give you the feeling of success and accomplishment that will, in turn, boost your motivation to keep pressing forward.
#16 – Start journaling daily.
When we think about keeping a journal or a diary, often we picture a teen girl writing about her latest crush or her plans for the upcoming school dance. However, this is a practice that has great benefits for adults as well. By journaling your thoughts and emotions each day, you provide yourself with an outlet to get it all out in one place. Furthermore, reflecting upon your journal entries may provide you with some insight into your own mind or help you to identify patterns in your thinking.
#17 – Create a home that encourages happiness and success.
Your home should be your safe space, your sanctuary from the world. This is the place where you can rest, recharge, motivate yourself and encourage your creativity. However, if your home is cluttered or disorganized, you may actually be hurting your own motivation and preventing yourself from feeling relaxed or happy while in your space. Take some time to sort through your home, selling, donating and throwing out what needs to be. You may even rearrange your furniture or make small changes like a fresh coat of paint just to give it a fresher, more uplifting feeling. You want to walk in the door and have a space that encourages you to leave the problems of the day behind.