“If you expect nothing from somebody, you are never disappointed.” – Sylvia Plath
A lot of times in life, our expectations can get the better of us. And while it’s normal to have expectations, unrealistic expectations will leave you disappointed time and time again. Yes, we do deserve some things in our relationships, such as love and respect, but when you begin to expect more than the basics-well, it’s a recipe for disaster.
Below, I will go over 9 things you should stop expecting from others immediately.
1. Stop expecting others to make you feel whole.
In our society, we grow up with this fairy tale idea of what love is. We are told our ‘other half is out there in the world, waiting to make us feel complete. The thing is- it is not anyone’s job to make you feel whole, and in reality- it’s not possible for someone else to fulfill you. You have to do the work to make yourself feel whole and fulfilled.
2. Stop expecting others to make you feel validated.
When you get caught up in the cycle of needing outside validation, you are going to end up desperate and addicted to attention from others. In all honesty, you will become a people-pleasing mess and you will lose sight of who you really are. Learn how to validate yourself.
3. Stop expecting other people to live up to your standards.
We often hold others to the standards we have set for ourselves in this life, which is extremely unfair. We are all at different places on our journey and our actions and energy tend to match where we are, not where other people expect us to be. Sadly, the only thing this does is create a power struggle between you and the other person, which can get toxic pretty quickly.
4. Stop expecting others to be perfect.
It’s completely absurd to expect others to be perfect because I guarantee you (without a shadow of a doubt) that you aren’t perfect either. If you think you are, you really need to work on that side of yourself- because that’s pretty outrageous. Remember, we all have things we struggle with. If the thing the other person is struggling with is hindering you-it’s okay to take space. It’s not okay to expect others to be perfect for you.
5. Stop expecting them to read your mind.
You may think that it’s normal to expect others to understand how you feel and what you are thinking. Remember, though, each of us has a number of things taking space in our minds-so it’s perfectly normal for someone to miss something that might be important to you. You have to communicate how you feel if you expect others to know.
6. Stop expecting others to do the work for you.
If you look at any influencer or motivational speaker’s page, you will notice tons of comments asking the other person to basically share every detail of how they achieved their success. Most good influencers and motivational speakers will show you how to come to your own conclusions or to find what works best for you- but they cannot do the work for you.
7. Stop expecting others to agree with everything you say.
No one is going to agree with everything you say all the time. We all have our own ideas, feelings, and goals, and what we say, do, and agree with will align with that.
8. Stop expecting people to change.
Yes, people do change- I am a firm believer in that. However, people don’t change for other people, they change for themselves.
9. Stop expecting everyone to save you.
No one is going to save you from your own choices. If you are waiting around for someone to come save you, I hate to break it to you- but the chances are slim to none. You’ve got to save yourself.