Skip to main content

Perhaps one of the most painful things in the entire world is finding out that your partner is cheating on you. Even worse is the feeling that you could have done something to get away from them before the betrayal had happened.

Unfortunately, the thing is, that until it happens, there is no way to know for sure. Cheaters are oftentimes master manipulators who carefully cover their tracks. As soon as you pick up on the slightest red flag, it’s time to listen to your heart and soul. I’m not saying to leave someone because you are feeling insecure, but if your partner is MAKING you feel insecure with their actions, behavior, and energy, it might be time to listen to your instincts.

Here are 9 signs that indicate your partner is going to cheat.

1. They hypothetically ask you what you would do if they cheated.

When faced with such hypothetical questions about cheating, Not ‘Just Friends’: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity” by Shirley P. Glass can be a valuable resource. This book offers insights into the psychology of infidelity and navigating these complex conversations.

2. They are MAJOR flirts.

You may notice before your partner ever cheats on you that they seem extremely flirtatious with other people. They might even make you feel uncomfortable, or give you the feeling that something is already going on. In reality, it’s in their nature to act shady.

3. You’ve caught them lying.

You’ve already caught them in lies, about where they’ve been and who they have been with. Actually, you may catch them in stupid, silly lies that really seem pointless. But, regardless, someone who lies all of the time isn’t likely to think twice about cheating.

Dealing with lying in a relationship can be challenging. Lying: Moral Choice in Public and Private Life” by Sissela Bok delves into the complexities of lying and truthfulness, offering perspectives on honesty and trust in relationships.

4. They hang around cheaters.

There’s an old saying that the company you keep is who you become. And that is a very truthful saying. Be wary if your partner’s friends are a bunch of cheaters.

5. They have a long ring finger.

It might sound silly, but according to research carried out by the University of Oxford, people who have long ring fingers are more likely to cheat. The reason for this, they believe, has something to do with testosterone exposure in the womb.

6. Your gut is telling you that something is off.

In the pit of your gut, you can tell something isn’t quite right. You may not be able to put your finger on it, but the signs are likely beginning to emerge.

To better trust and understand your intuition in relationships, The Gift of Fear” by Gavin de Becker is an excellent read, teaching you to trust and act on your instincts, especially in potentially harmful situations.

7. They cheated on their ex.

Not all people who have cheated before will cheat again, but it most definitely is an indication that they have it in them to cheat if they’ve done it before. If other signs are present, you may need to be wary.

8. They pick fights.

Suddenly, your partner is picking fights with you all of the time and over nothing. It almost seems as though they are trying to find an excuse to get away from you. And if the fights are in conjunction with other signs, it could be an indication that they are looking for a quick out to cheat on you.

9. They are suddenly busy all the time.

When someone is preparing to cheat, they are likely to distance themselves from you. They may stay over at work more and more, or completely blow you off for friends and others that they normally wouldn’t blow you off to be around. Pay attention to how someone is acting, because if they are starting to pull back, it’s likely because something is happening or about to.

In cases where your partner becomes increasingly busy or absent, Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship” by Mira Kirshenbaum could help you assess your relationship and make informed decisions.