When you are raised by a highly critical parent, it can shape you into who you become as an adult. Adults who were raised by highly critical parents tend to share similar traits.
Not only can these effects be seen, but they can also be measured. Based on studies, overly critical parents have a major effect on their kids. In many cases, children who are raised by overly critical parents tend to struggle with themselves and with others. Below, I will go over these issues associated with being raised by an overly critical parent.
1. Struggling to regulate emotions.
Those who grew up with an overly critical parent will struggle to regulate their emotions and will have major mood swings. This is largely part to the fact that after you have been torn down for so long, it can wear down your central nervous system and can make it hard for you to regulate emotions.
2. Difficulty trusting yourself.
We develop our sense of self-esteem through our encounters with our parents. In a way, our parents show us how to trust ourselves. However, when your parent is overly critical, it can damage the way you view yourself.
3. Difficulty trusting others.
Additionally, we learn how to trust others from our encounters with our parents. If our parents were constantly dragging us down and always making us feel bad about ourselves, it can make it much harder to trust others in the future.
4. You tend to shy away from new challenges.
Do you shy away from new challenges? Fear of the unknown could be caused by having an overly critical person. Deep down, you may struggle to believe you have the ability to tackle life’s challenges because your parents were always chipping away at your self-esteem.
5. Mistakes throw you off balance.
Having an overly critical parent can have you believing that the slightest mistake is the end of the world. While many people bounce back, you may have a tendency to be way too hard on yourself. So, when mistakes happen, it can take time for you to come back from them.
6. Struggles with perfectionism.
A lot of children with overly critical parents overcompensate for perfectionism. In their minds, if they can be perfect, there will be nothing to criticize. Unfortunately, perfection doesn’t exist, so this unreachable standard can make life even harder.
7. Feeling the need to always apologize.
Are you always apologizing? When you grow up with an overly critical parent, you may feel as though nothing you ever do is enough. So, when something happens, you just go ahead and apologize.
8. Being defensive in nature.
When you were raised by overly critical parents, it can leave you on edge. You may feel defensive and feel like everything someone says will be critical, because that is what you grew accustomed to.
9. You struggle with social anxiety.
Many people who grow up with overly critical parents struggle with social anxiety. When you have gotten so used to having to be hypervigilant around people, you may permanently end up in a hyper vigilant state. This can make socializing extremely anxiety-inducing.