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There is so much talk about abuse and misconduct in our society, yet everyone tends to overlook the giant elephant in the room: women are just as toxic if not sometimes more toxic than men are. If this comes off as offensive, or alarming to you, then I suggest you continue reading to understand what I mean.

On social media, I notice a lot of alarming posts. One I saw just recently sent a chill up my spine. On the post, it had a text conversation between a man and a woman. The woman says, “Hey babe,” and 15 seconds later sends another message, “Oh I see you ain’t responding to my texts, just go find you someone else then.” The caption to this read, “Me as a girlfriend – LOL” with a laughing face emoji. I’m sorry, but that is not funny. I’ve seen others where it’s insinuated that the girlfriend beat her boyfriend with a hammer and is asking for prayers for him. Yet again, the post is captioned and reacted to with laughs. Turn this around, and replace the female in both scenarios with a man. If the man harassed his girlfriend for not replying in 15 seconds, he would be called an obsessive boyfriend or a toxic narcissist by today’s standards. And if a man beat his girlfriend with a hammer – it would be headline news, not a funny Facebook post.

As a female, please don’t take me the wrong way. I am NOT trying to tear down other women. But I think something is wrong when it’s funny and entertaining and even thought to be admirable by so many modern women for females to beat on their significant others, but if a man so much as disagrees with his girlfriend, he’s gaslighting her.

Recently, this topic came to a head with the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial, and so many people were able to see what a toxic and abusive woman looks like and behaves like. And I truly hope that this sets a precedent for our society to realize that men are not the only ones who can be toxic. Men can and often are the victims of abuse too. If you are a man, and you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, get the hell away from her. Don’t let anyone say anything bad to you for doing so. And if you have a bad feeling that what is happening may be abuse, look out for these signs.

1. She isolates you from your friends, family, etc.

If your wife or girlfriend has completely isolated you away from your friends and family, never allowing you to spend time with anyone but her, this is abuse. Oftentimes, abusers do this, so they can brainwash you into bending to their will. And isolation is one of the leading signs of abuse.

2. She falsely accuses you of abuse.

It is never okay to falsely accuse someone of abuse. Abuse is a serious topic, and falsely accusing someone of abuse is ABUSE. I’m sorry, but I’m not sorry to say this.

3. She stalks you.

If your girlfriend stalks your social media account, follows you to work, and participates in any stalking activities, this is not healthy. It’s not normal to stalk your partner. And if you have a partner who is doing this, her behavior could ultimately end up being dangerous.

4. She assassinates your character.

Character assassination is if your partner goes around on a smear campaign any time you don’t do what she wants. She may call your friends up and say untrue things about you to them to tarnish your relationship. She may say things about you like calling you crazy, or a liar, or accusing you of things you didn’t do.

5. She obsesses over you.

Obsession is not loved. It might be flattering to have someone obsess about you, especially if you’ve never gotten that kind of attention, but trust me, an obsessive girlfriend or partner is not someone who is going to be healthy or right for you. I know that may suck, but obsessive tendencies only end up developing into something much scarier.

6. She gaslights you.

Gaslighting is when someone works to make you doubt your sanity. Oftentimes this can start slow, she might make jabs at you, calling you crazy or insane. Then, she will completely deny something happening that you witnessed or have proof of. Over time, this crazy-making can literally make you lose your sanity.

7. She physically abuses you.

I don’t care how little she is, or how funny it may seem, if a woman hits you, there is a problem. I assure you if you hit her back, it wouldn’t be accepted. Don’t allow anyone to abuse you.

8. She demeans you.

Emotionally abusive women will belittle you. She will tear down your manhood, she will hit you below the belt (emotionally speaking) and she will constantly say things that are painful and cruel. Believe me, when I say, this is abuse to a major extent.