When it comes to disarming the narcissist most people go about it entirely wrong. If you are trying to prevent them from gaining control over your life you need to be much more vigilant than you might assume.
You might not see the narcissist for what he or she is right off the bat but once his or her true colors begin to show you should not deny them. While it might not be obvious in the beginning as time passes you will really begin to see things as they are. No matter how hard you try to fix things with this person or how much you invest into the relationship things still never change.
If you want to keep yourself out of the control of the narcissist you need to be sure to do the following things. Because narcissists are rarely ever aware of their problems or willing to change sticking around is only going to make you suffer. These things will help you put the narcissist in his or her place and bring you closer to where you need to be.
7 Things You Can Do To Keep The Narcissist From Controlling You:
1. Stop giving them power over you.
Stop giving into the narcissist! Make it known in your own mind that he or she is a narcissist so that when you continue on you are no longer giving into their wants. Do not let them tell you what to do and do not allow them to ‘keep you in check.’
2. Do not give the narcissist any engagement.
Stop engaging with the narcissist when he or she is acting out. If this person is pitching a fit ignore them. While this isn’t always the easiest thing to do, it makes a big difference in the long run. If they are getting violent, remove yourself from the situation.
Stop allowing the narcissist to cross your boundaries. The more he or she tries to push your limits the less you should allow him or her to do so. Once your boundaries are set in place you should not budge.
Do not challenge the narcissist. When you challenge the narcissist you are playing a one-sided game and there is nothing good about any of that. Continue disengaging with the narcissist and allow yourself room to move forth without him or her bothering you on a deeper level.
Do not play the blame game with the narcissist. Do not blame him or her for things or allow him or her to blame you for things. You are not a doormat and if you didn’t do something you should not hold the blame for it.
6. Accept that this person will not change.
Once you have accepted that the narcissist is not going to change you can begin distancing yourself from him or her. You should not be brought down by the people you love. You should be with someone who is willing to build you up.
7. Cut ties and move forth with your life.
Once you’ve begun distancing yourself from the narcissist, cut ties. Cutting ties with the narcissist is the best thing you can do for yourself. The longer you hold onto them the more damage they will be able to do in your life.