When you’re in a relationship being mindful of the things you say is important. While not everyone is aware of this, we should all be trying to focus a little deeper in regards.

The things you say are powerful, you can choose to say things to build people up or to break them down. The more positive you are in how you speak to the people who mean the most to you the more abundant your connection will become. If you’re always saying things that hurt your lover, in the end, you’re going to be forced to part ways whether you want to or not.

Sometimes the things we think are harmless are actually doing the most harm. If you’re using any of the following words in a negative manner you’re probably causing your relationship to suffer as a result. These things need to stop if you want to grow in a healthy manner towards one another instead of growing apart. Before saying these things, consider the context and how saying it is going to make the person you’re speaking to feel.

6 Words That Ruin Every Relationship:

1. Whatever

When your partner is trying to explain something to you and your response is ‘whatever’ you can really leave him/her feeling unimportant. The more that this happens the more that your partner will feel their emotions or thoughts don’t matter to you. This is in many ways a serious form of dismissing them that you should not be indulging in.

2. Always 

Telling your partner that they always do something you dislike or that you always have certain issues with them is only going to make the situations worse. This word is something that is used to avoid things. Instead of working through the issue you’re just making your partner seem wrong and refusing to see things through.

3. Divorce/Breakup

If your first thought when you’re fighting with your partner is to suggest that you just end things, you’re already causing more problems than you realize. When you get heated suggesting an end to things is never the answer. You should suggest maybe walking away for a few hours and talking things out once you’ve both calmed down but if you don’t want to break up, stop suggesting it.

4. Never

This too is something many use when they want to avoid certain conversations. This is a word that doesn’t give any wiggle room and makes your partner feel as though he or she is being backed against a wall. Context again is very important to keep in mind.

5. But

When you use this word you’re making the things you already said mean less. This for instance when followed negatively after you’ve given someone a compliment can tear them down. They feel unappreciated and as if they can never do anything right.

6. You

When you use the word ‘you,’ make sure you’re certain of the things you’re nailing down onto a specific person. This is like pointing your finger and blaming someone for something. You have to make sure they are the ones who did it before going this route.

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shift-mind/201904/our-words-matter

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/healing-together/2012/05/are-you-invalidating-your-partner-without-realizing-it/

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