There are thousands of responsibilities a parent will have to deal with throughout being a parent and to be frankly honest, it can be extremely stressful at times. We all want to be happy parents- but, how do you find peace in the chaos?
Well, first things first- you are going to have to adjust your mindset. This is not always an easy thing to do- especially if you have been losing yourself in the chaos. If you want to be a happier parent, not only for yourself but also for the well-being of your child, there are five things you are going to have to let go of.
1. The expectation that you can be a ‘perfect’ parent.
It’s in our human nature to try to compete with other people, and this competitive nature has come out in full force over the past few years with the rise of social media. We look at a few feeds, see a few mom influencers leading seemingly perfect lives, doing all the things for their kids and making it look easy, and we are left wondering why we aren’t perfect parents either. The thing is, there is no such thing as a perfect parent. If you want to be happy as a parent, focus on doing your best, give yourself some grace, and let go of the need for perfection.
2. Keeping up the score.
If you are keeping a score of which parent is doing more, you are going to end up exhausted mentally all of the time. It’s a waste of your energy and your time. Instead, do what you can, and don’t feel obligated to do anything that is beyond your capabilities. Conversely, don’t obligate others to live up to your expectations, either.
Not all parents yell, but if you tend to yell when you get upset, you may need to ask yourself one simple question: is it helping? It’s highly likely that instead of helping your relationship with your child and your well-being that it is doing the opposite.
4. Trying to mimic other people’s parenting approach.
Not every parenting approach is one size fits all. I am sorry, but it isn’t. Rather than trying to mimic others – try a few different (acceptable) approaches and see what works for you and your family. Be flexible. Make adjustments and keep trying.
5. Unhealthy self-sacrifice.
There is a huge misconception that if you are going to be a good parent, you have to be selfless. However, this is largely flawed. Why? Well, because if you aren’t taken care of, you aren’t going to be able to take care of anyone else.