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Once upon a time, it was pretty ‘normal’ for parents to use yelling as a primary form of discipline. I know I grew up being yelled at and so did my parents, but thanks to a lot of new research and academic study, we now realize that yelling is a pretty terrible option for raising children.

Some studies have compared the effects of yelling to the effects of corporal punishment. Based on the research, children who are yelled at on a regular tend to be more anxious, and aggressive and struggle with academia. Due to this, it’s best to nix the yelling and find a more peaceful way to speak with your children.

Here are 4 changes you will notice when you lower your voice.

1. Your children will stop trying to fight you so much.

When you yell at your kids, they may immediately become defensive and agitated. In turn, they are likely to trust you less and buck up against you more often. When you stop yelling, your kids will ease up, because whether you realize it or not, they are taking your lead when you yell.

2. They listen better.

When you stop yelling and start talking, your kids start to listen to you more. Oftentimes, when we start yelling, our kids either get scared or shut us out. Because of this, yelling isn’t making you get heard more, you are heard less. When you stop yelling, they start listening better.

3. You feel like a better parent.

I always felt guilty about yelling at my kids. I always walked away feeling like I had made the situation worse and as it turns out, I was making things worse. Now, that I have stopped yelling as much, I feel much better about my parenting.

4. Your whole family dynamic will change.

Your whole family will change when you stop yelling. It’s like peace will come over your household. It may seem odd, but when you are always yelling, you are setting the tone for your home.