Manipulative people will try to control you for a number of reasons. While sometimes those reasons are quite obvious they are not always as plain to see as you might want them to be.
Being manipulated feels terrible and it is something I would not wish on even my worst enemy. While a lot of us can spot it early on not everyone can and this causes a lot of confusion. For manipulators, the things they do are all about getting what they want and using you to do so.
You might end up being manipulated because you are in a position that can benefit the person wanting to manipulate you or because you are perhaps an easy target. The ‘why’ is never as easy to pinpoint as it should be.
Below I am going to go over some of the more common ways in which people try to control others. These things are extremely manipulative and should be things we all consider to be red flags. If someone is doing these things to you, do not let them continue, stand up for yourself.
17 Ways Manipulative People Will Try to Control You and Why:
1. They try to make everything about themselves.
They do this because when they turn everything into something about themselves you are more likely to help them to succeed. When something isn’t going right for them you cannot help but wanting to fix things. This is just how most people function, we want to help others.
2. They are always pointing out your weaknesses.
They do this because the lower that they make you feel the more likely you are to conform and bend to their will. They want you to be as low as you possibly can be so that they can be in control. The more control they have of you, the better.
They do this because it is their way of getting you on their side. If you are feeling bad for them they will be more likely to get their way. They are constantly toying with the emotions of others.
4. They intellectually bully you.
They will shove facts down your throat and make you think they know what they are talking about to get you on their side. This is so that they can have you doing the things they want you to do. if you believe them you are more likely to perform as they see fit.
5. They cut you off from your friends or family.
They cut you off from the people who matter most to you because they know those people will see through them. They want you all to themselves so they can have you doing what they want you to do. The people who care for you will bring too much awareness to you.
6. They turn your words to benefit them.
They make everything into something it is not. They manipulate your words and turn everything around. You might complain about something only to find them playing the pity party to get their way.
They guilt trip you into doing the things they want you to do. If you say no they will remind you of something they did for you. The more you allow them to do the more they will bring it up.
8. They are always denying things that they did or said.
They never own up to the things they say or do. They always make you out to be the crazy person. This is a very cunning manipulation tactic.
9. They make you feel like your problems are not big enough.
They do their best to make you feel as if your problems do not matter at all. Nothing you do is ever good enough and the things bothering you are not as bad as you make them out to be. This is their mindset.
10. They are quick to become aggressive.
They are quick to become aggressive because they know it evokes a response. They use their rage against you and it is somewhat terrifying. These kinds of people are not good people to be around.
11. They make you feel inadequate.
They make you feel as if you are not good enough. This is also a way to break you down. The more they are able to break you down the more control they have over you.
Giving you the silent treatment is their way of wearing you down. They do this so that you will give into what it is they want you to do. most of the time things like this work well.
13. They bait you into things.
They bait you into doing things. You give an inch and they take a mile. These kinds of people will never give you the effort you give them.
They do whatever it takes to convince you to do the things they want you to do. They go above and beyond to have you conform. You cannot really avoid them when it comes to most things.
15. They pretend they cannot do something so that you will do it for them.
They pretend to be incapable so that you will do things for them. They know you will do whatever they want you to do because you care. This is a very sick tactic.
16. They give you basically no time to decide.
They don’t give you time to decide so that they can rope you into things. This is their way of forcing you to do things you do not want to do. You do not have time to say no.
17. They use your feelings for them against you.
They will say things like ‘if you love me you will’ and so forth. This is their way of really locking you in place. They want you to prove yourself to them in all ways possible.