Toxic relationships are terrible, and if you’ve ever been in one, you likely know that. However, perhaps the most difficult aspect of a toxic relationship is that because we are in love, it can be difficult to know the difference between a rough patch, and a toxic relationship that cannot be repaired.
When we are in love, we may miss all of the obvious signs that the relationship we are in is toxic. The reason for this is that we want to make every effort we can to save the relationship. But, some signs cannot be ignored. If you feel like you are in a toxic relationship, and you are wondering when to draw the line, here are 14 signs that indicate it’s time to leave your toxic partner.
1. They hurt you emotionally, verbally, or physically.
When a partner hurts you emotionally, verbally, or physically, it’s time to leave. Ab*sers don’t stop hurting you, and the longer you stay, the worse the abuse is likely going to progress. Oftentimes, emotional and verbal misconduct end up escalating to physical misconduct.
2. They lie all the time.
We all tell little white lies, however, when you notice that your partner lies all the time, about everything, it’s a major red flag. Trust is an important part of a relationship, and trust simply isn’t possible when dealing with a pathological liar.
3. They don’t want help.
When you are dealing with a partner that doesn’t want to try to be better for you, and they continue to do you wrong, it’s time to let go. In some cases, when a long-time partner messes up, but they are willing to accept responsibility and go through counseling, the relationship can be saved. But it cannot when the other person doesn’t want help.
4. They don’t emotionally support you at all.
Emotional support is what being in a relationship is all about. So, if you are in a relationship where your partner is cold and callous and refuses to ever be there for you on an emotional level, there is no longer any point in staying.
5. There is no communication.
Communication is important, because it ensures transparency, honesty, and it allows two people who may not necessarily see eye to eye to find common ground. Without it, relationships end up in shambles, with no way to correct the problem.
6. They have no respect for you.
If your partner doesn’t respect you, they don’t love you either. I know that may sound pretty intense, but it’s the truth. Without respect, there can be no love. And constant disrespect is abusive.
7. They are crazy jealous.
We all get jealous, but when your partner is monitoring your every move, and always accusing you of cheating when you’ve done nothing wrong, there’s a problem. Unfortunately, social media has worked hard to normalize this type of toxicity with memes and jokes circulating the internet. When someone acts crazy jealous to the point of control, it’s not funny, it’s not cute, and it’s not a joke- it’s abuse.
8. They try to make you feel crazy.
Gaslighting is a tactic that toxic people use to disarm their partners. For example, if your partner does something wrong, and calls you crazy for pointing it out, that is gaslighting. However, gaslighting can also be subtle. Oftentimes, it begins that way and escalates to something more in line with my above example. Regardless, when someone is in a gaslighting relationship for a long period, it can eventually destroy their mental health. And no one is worth that.
9. They are using you.
If you begin to notice your partner only shows you affection when you do something or buy something for them, they are likely using you. And if someone is using you, and not truly in love with you, it’s time to let go.
10. They are trying to isolate you from your social support.
Sociopaths, narcissists, and psychopaths work to isolate their partners from their friends and family, so they will become codependent upon them. If your partner constantly manipulates you and isolates you from your family, it’s time to go.
11. They refuse to ever accept responsibility for their actions.
A person who does wrong accepts responsibility and genuinely apologizes is one thing. However, when your partner is constantly hurting you, but will never accept responsibility, they aren’t going to change.
12. Your needs aren’t getting met.
People have needs, all of us do. We have emotional and physical needs, and in a relationship, we work to fulfill each other’s needs. While there will be times in which one partner is struggling, if your needs are continuously overlooked, it’s a red flag that the relationship is not right.
13. You resent your partner.
Over time, a toxic relationship will go through many cycles. But when love is replaced with resentment, it’s often the case that there is no going back. And if you find that all the love you once held for your partner has been replaced with resentment, it’s likely the relationship is already over.
14. They are cruel to you and others.
One of the first red flags in a relationship should be when you notice your partner is cruel to others. Recently, I watched a documentary about a woman who was married to a man who ended up killing his entire family. Years before this, the woman reported seeing him being cruel to people and animals. If your partner is cruel to any living being to an alarming extent, LEAVE!!!!!!