We live in a world where it is not only acceptable for people to act immature, greedy, and selfish, it is encouraged. And for the old soul, this can make it difficult to make it through daily social activities, much less enter into a reciprocating relationship.

As an old soul, I have struggled my entire life to fit in. While most kids wanted to gossip and bully one another, I was more concerned about conversating with older and wiser people to learn as much as I could. I didn’t care for small talk, petty arguments, and living my life as the center of attention. Instead, I spent much of my time alone and in private.

When I entered the dating world, I became disappointed over and over again, and couldn’t quite place why. What was wrong with me? Was I an alien? Well, as it turns out, I am an old soul. And while this is a beautiful thing, it can be quite painful. Here are 14 reasons why it’s difficult to find love as an old soul.

1. We expect a lot.

While we don’t want our partners to be perfect, we do have expectations, and many of them are considered old-fashioned. When you say something, we expect you to do what you say, and when you act a certain way, we take you at face value.

2. We know what we want.

We know exactly what we want, and we don’t care to settle for anything less. If we notice you aren’t quite the type for us, we move on to other things, no offense intended. We simply know that we will never be happy with anything less.

3. We value raw conversation.

In a world of small talk, short texts, and instant gratification- we are outcasts. We value hours of conversation about the meaning of life, our favorite memories, and our aspirations. Please, spare me the details of celebrity gossip and the current situation regarding the weather.

4. We want romance.

Romance is highly undervalued in the current generation (my generation) and it is beyond disappointing. I don’t expect a man to sweep me off my feet in Paris, but jeez, at least send me some flowers and surprise me by not only paying attention to the things that make me happy but also to the sweet moments.

5. We are extremely intuitive.

Sometimes, our intuition can be our downfall. Because while my exes may not have said how they felt or what they were up to, I could sense it a mile away. And nothing ruins a relationship faster than reading that someone A. isn’t really into me, or B. Is up to no good.

6. We focus on a bigger purpose in life.

And we carry this into our relationships. I know that there is a deeper reason for our existence, and I intend to continue my search to find what that is and to grow into my true purpose. While I enjoy the small things, the bigger picture matters and it’s hard to find someone who feels the same.

7. We don’t care for meaningless flings.

I am dating to find my person. Not to find my one nightstand. And while it may sound like I take things too seriously, I truly care about seeking someone out who is on the same page as me, and that could be my soulmate. Netflix and chill? Nah. Let’s spend hours under the moon talking about our passions and dreams and chill.

8. We don’t quite care about modern customs.

Instead of meeting people on Tinder or at a bar, I want to go out into the world and meet someone at a library in the literature section, or someone who is stargazing. I don’t much care to get drunk and sleep with you, only to wakeup in regret with nothing accomplished but a meaningless fling.

9. As highly empathetic beings, we often attract the wrong kind of people.

Toxic people feed off of highly empathic people and use them until nothing is left. I try to have a heart for everyone, even those that society has shunned, and time and time again it has left me in shambles.

10. We have been through a lot.

We are not old souls for no reason- our life struggles, our childhoods, and the various situations in our life caused us to grow much faster than normal. And this baggage tends to send people running in the opposite direction.

11. We don’t play games.

I say what I feel, no matter what it is. I’d rather be giggly and dorky while professing my love than pretending to lose interest, ignoring your texts and playing hard to get. I don’t have time for that.

12. We don’t fit in with the modern age.

While most of my friends are constantly on Facebook, spilling every detail of their life, I’d rather be out living my life. I don’t care to sit with someone who is staring at their phone instead of talking with me, and if that is a modern society, I will pass.

13. We aren’t afraid to move on.

If a relationship isn’t working, I am not sticking around five more years just in case. I won’t be rude, but I will move along to someone else who could be the right one.

14. We allow our freak flag to fly high.

It is not a thing for me to be myself, even if it isn’t what most people would consider the norm. I don’t care if I don’t fit in with the latest trends, or if someone thinks my style is strange or tacky. I am content with my weird self.

Featured Image Via Tomasz Alen Kopera

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