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Just because you love someone does not mean they will love you back. You can love someone with your whole heart, and it still not ‘be enough’ for them. 

Sometimes we fall for the wrong people, or perhaps even the right people at the wrong times. You see, we’re all on our own paths in this world and until we reach a certain point within ourselves, loving others is not something we’re as capable of as we might think. There are people on this planet who right now are unable to truly give the love back that they receive. 

loving you Consider diving into a book such as “Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – and Keep – Love which delves into attachment styles and can provide insight into why certain relationships don’t work out.

Those people have a lot of work that they need to do on themselves, and they can’t do that work with you by their side struggling to gain their affections. If they don’t love themselves, how in the world are they ever going to love you or anyone else? Below I am going to go over some of the signs that might indicate you’re loving someone who isn’t able to love you yet and why you should distance yourself from them while they grow.

If after they’ve grown things work out in the end, so be it, but you shouldn’t let yourself waste away by their side while they refuse to give you what you give out. You deserve the love you seek.

12 Signs Someone You Love Isn’t Capable Of Loving You Back:

1. They’re never willing to fight for anything or anyone.

Someone who cannot love you will not fight for you or really anything else. They don’t want to put the effort into making things work, so they’re always talking about jumping ship. They never really make you aware that they want to be with you, everything is always ‘oh well, I’ll just leave.’

2. They never own up to their wrongdoings.

When someone who doesn’t love you makes a mistake, they won’t own up to it. They will go out of their way to make it sound like it’s not their fault and keep pushing that for as long as they can. This is because they don’t respect you enough to let you know the truth.

3. They refuse to communicate properly.

If this person loved you, communication would come easily. When someone has a lot of growing to do on their own, they struggle to sit down and talk things out. They become uncomfortable and shutdown.

Sometimes, the reasons are not as straightforward. It could be due to timing, past traumas, or simply an emotional misalignment. And while the road to understanding can be long and arduous, having a journal, like the “The Healing Path: A Guided Journal for Navigating Heartbreak,” can be instrumental in processing and moving forward.

4. They don’t want to let you meet anyone who really matters to them.

While it might not sound like a lot to some, if they really cared about you, they’d be introducing you to the people who matter the most to them. They haven’t because they don’t see you in their lifelong term. I know that’s hard to face, but it’s often the truth.

5. They’re constantly playing the blame game.

People who play blame games don’t know how to love. They just know how to trick. They go out of their way to make sure they’re never owning up to anything.

6. They only think of themselves.

People who don’t know how to love others yet only ever think of themselves. They don’t take the emotions or thoughts of the people who care about them into consideration. Your feelings don’t matter to them.

7. They cannot be trusted.

If you cannot trust them, they likely have given you many reasons not to. This meaning they don’t love you enough to keep the truth at the forefront of your relationship. People like this need to grow up in a lot of ways, and until they do you’re going to feel torn inside.

8. They do not respect your boundaries.

When someone loves you, they will always respect your boundaries. They won’t push you to do things you don’t want to do and they will be there for you when you’re suffering. Those who try to force you into things don’t care about you or your well-being.

9. They will not open up to you emotionally.

When someone loves you, even if it’s hard for them, they will open up to you emotionally on some level. Only those who don’t want you to get to know them will refuse this entirely. That happens for a lot of reasons and can be quite damning for a relationship as a whole.

While the process of healing and understanding is deeply personal, it’s essential to remember you’re not alone. Many have traveled this road before and have found their way back to love and happiness. Reading real-life experiences and expert insights, such as those found in “Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love, can offer comfort and perspective during trying times.

10. They only ever offer excuse after excuse.

Someone who doesn’t really love you will keep making excuses for their toxic behavior. They think they can keep tricking you, and so they continue to try. The more you allow it, the worse it will get.

11. They’re never satisfied and always wanting more from you.

People who don’t know how to love others are always searching for something they will never find. Nothing is ever good enough for them, and they never know how to appreciate the people around them or the things those people do for them. It’s like you’re always one step behind and falling as you walk.

12. They refuse to open their minds and look at things from a different perspective. 

The more these people move on and less they grow, the further behind they end up. They refuse to open their minds and close themselves off in big ways. This will only hold you back as well if you remain near them.