In relationships, we often battle with ourselves on the expectations we hold for our partners. And while there are most definitely unrealistic expectations we often may have, there are some expectations we are entitled to.

Setting expectations is a healthy and productive way to ensure that your relationship is right for both partners. Without expectations, we cannot begin to understand where our limits begin and end. And when we are both clear on our expectations from day one, there is no room left for misunderstandings.

With that being said, if you are unsure of what expectations are healthy and what expectations might be unrealistic, here are 10 expectations that are healthy in a relationship.

1. Expect respect.

In a relationship, respect is a must for both partners. When one or both partners constantly disrespect the other by not abiding by their boundaries, and by disrespectfully talking to them, it destroys the relationship.

2. Expect compassion.

Compassion is also extremely important and necessary in a relationship. Compassion means that while you may not be able to understand what they are going through at all times, you understand it’s important to treat them with kindness.

3. Expect clear communication.

Communication is also another expectation that is healthy in a relationship. Clear and concise communication ensures that even when things go awry, you can talk it through and find a way to resolve your issues. It also allows for transparency, which I talk more about below.

4. Expect compromise.

Compromise is a must in a relationship. There will be times in which you cannot both agree on something, and in those moments, compromise is a must. Compromise is saying, “We don’t agree on this, so let us find a middle ground that makes us both happy.”

5. Expect intimacy.

Intimacy and affection are a must in a relationship. And while it may be unrealistic to demand intimacy at all times, it is realistic to want in regularly.

6. Expect consideration.

Consideration means that you think about your partner’s desires, needs, and limits before making a decision that impacts both of you. For example, if your wife doesn’t feel well, it would be inconsiderate to invite everyone you know over for a cookout. So, you ask her when she feels better to let you know, and you will make arrangements.

7. Expect time.

While you cannot expect to spend every waking second with your partner, it’s reasonable to ask for time together. Time together is what builds a bond between you and establishes trust, and keeps the spark alive.

8. Expect space.

And of course, space is necessary. I talk to a lot of people about their relationships, and during my talks, I notice there is a strange phenomenon happening in relationships in which people expect their partner to never spend a waking moment away from them. This is unhealthy and downright toxic. Space is necessary for a relationship. It’s very important to have time to yourself and lead your own life, otherwise, you will feel suffocated and stagnant as a human being.

9. Expect interest.

It’s reasonable to expect that your partner will have an interest in you far more than anyone else. When you are constantly met with apathy and disinterest by your partner, it can be disheartening and downright heartbreaking. Of course, I am not saying your partner should constantly be in awe of you, but a healthy amount of interest is necessary.

10. Expect honesty and transparency.

And one major expectation that is a MUST for any healthy relationship is honesty and transparency. If an issue arises, tell your partner. If something is on your mind, tell your partner. If something bad happens, tell your partner.

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