Friendship is one of the most valuable things you can every experience in your life. And as parents, it is our job to pass on the lessons we learn to help our children flourish in life and in love.
There are so many things I have learned about friendship throughout my life. And I intend to teach my daughter every one of these lessons and so much more. I know how precious it is to have good people standing by your side. Throughout my life, without the people that have stood by me, my life would have been so difficult and even at times seemingly meaningless.
In other times, I clung desperately to the wrong people and ended up with many emotional scars.
Here are 10 things I want to teach my daughter about friendship.
1. Always be kind.
You will never have regrets about being kind to others. Even if someone isn’t kind to you, be kind to them. They are probably the ones who need it most.
2. Not everyone is going to like you & that’s okay.
There are going to be some people who simply don’t like you. Not because of anything you’ve done, but because you aren’t their people. It may sting a little bit- but it will always be for the best that you heed their energy and move along.
3. Let go of high standards and lovingly accept people.
It’s okay to have boundaries and even expectations of others. But, be wary not to hold such high standards that are unreachable for others. You will end up alone and miserable if you expect everyone to be perfect, and the major thing to know is that no one is perfect, not even you.
Don’t just wait your turn because you are waiting to speak. Genuinely listen to other people. One of the only things a true friend requires of you is your attention- and it’s honestly not that hard to give them that.
5. Boundaries are everything.
Boundaries are so important with others. Learn and understand what yours are, and know and understand the boundaries of others. Unless you understand boundaries, you will either give too much of yourself or you will end up trampling over the boundaries of others. In most cases, people will tell you their boundaries if you listen.
6. You have to be a good friend to have friends.
In order to make good friends, you need to learn how to be a good friend. And really, it’s not hard. Show up for the people you love, stand by them during the small hurdles and the big ones, listen when they are speaking and make time for them.
7. If you can’t be yourself around them, they are not for you.
If you have to pretend to be someone you are not around someone, then they are not your people. Your people won’t expect you to be anything but who you are. They won’t judge you, and they won’t make you feel like you are unworthy. They will accept you with open arms.
8. Don’t engage in gossip.
Gossip is such an unsavory activity. Not only is it hurtful to the person you are gossiping about, but it’s hurtful to your soul as well. If you hear someone gossiping, do not engage and do not participate.
9. Loyalty is so important.
Loyalty means something. It means that no matter what, you’ve got your friend’s back. If you hear someone talking about your friend, stand up for them.
10. Always show up for your friends.
Always show up for your friends – not just during the big hurdles. But also, during the small ones. Be there for the people you love.