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Most people think to believe that when they finally find the perfect relationship that things will all fall into place, and they will never have to experience any problems ever again. And while a happy relationship will most definitely bring you peace, there is no such thing as perfect.

Even the happiest of relationships requires time, work, and attention. And happy relationships don’t just happen, they take time and effort to build. If you are looking for a relationship to come easy, you are in for a rude awakening. However, if you are up for putting in the time and effort necessary, a happy relationship is most definitely worth it.

Here are 10 harsh truths about happy relationships.

1. There will be days when everything feels like a struggle.

On some days, everything is going to feel like a struggle. Things will inevitably happen that will throw you and your partner off balance, and it will take work to get back to where you need to be. As long as you continue to work with your partner, these struggles, no matter how hard can be overcome.

2. You aren’t always going to like your partner.

There will be days in which you don’t like your partner at all. Everything they do will get on your nerves. You will struggle to even stay in the same room with them at times. This is normal because no one likes everyone all the time. It’s just the way it is.

3. You are going to have to compromise what you want at times for peace.

If you go into a relationship believing that all your needs are always going to be met, you are in for a rude awakening. I’m not saying that your needs don’t matter, but relationships involve two people with two wills of their own. At times, your will is going to be different than your partners. During these situations, you will have to compromise.

4. The physical isn’t always going to be great.

Sometimes, you and your partner will have a mind-blowing physical experience. However, there will also be times in which the love making is subpar or even nonexistent. That’s okay and nothing to worry about. If you envision your perfect relationship as a situation in which you are having movie love all the time, you may need to adjust your expectations.

5. Sometimes, the spark will fade.

The spark in a loving relationship will ebb and flow. There will be days in which you feel like a teenager again, and then on others, you will wonder what you are even doing anymore. On those days, you will have to recenter your focus and actively work to reignite it, with your partner.

6. Your partner isn’t you – so there will be differences.

Your partner is not a clone of you. They are a completely different person, with their expectations, desires, fantasies, and ideas. No matter how much you may want them to see something the way you see it, there will be times in which they simply won’t.

7. Sometimes, you will still feel lonely.

This may come as a shock, but even when you are in a relationship, you are going to be lonely. And when you feel lonely, unless it’s due to your partner neglecting you, it’s not their fault. This is just another part of life. After you’ve been around the same person for a long time, you get used to them. Sometimes, you will sit in the same room and not even say a word. And that’s okay too.

8. Communication will take continued practice.

Most people assume that when they have been together for a while, they will fall into sync with their partner. And while that may be true at times, there are times in which your synchronicity will go out the window. During those times, you will have to try your best to communicate in a way that is beneficial to both of you.

9. Sometimes, you will misunderstand one another.

There again, you are two different people. You are going to have misunderstandings, and you are going to have arguments. Just remember to communicate and ask questions and as long as you continue to work with one another, you will make it through.

10. You have to maintain your identity.

Perhaps one of the most misunderstood aspects of a relationship is this notion that when you join a couple, you have to merge and become one with this person. In place of individual identities, many people become one meshed-together people. They become unhealthily codependent. For a happy relationship to remain happy and healthy, both people in the relationship must continue to maintain their own identity and take time for themselves.