When someone we care about passes away and leaves this world or something terrible happens in our lives, we go through grief. Grief is a normal part of life and no one is immune to feeling it.
While in this day and age a lot of people will try to rush others through their grieving processes, we should not allow them to do that to us. As human beings, we all process things in our own ways, and for some of us that takes a lot more time than others might expect. You should never let someone make you feel bad for the way you’re working on letting go and healing within.
We all go through loss and other things of the sort in our own ways and working to understand the stages of grief can help you address it when that is needed. You need to process things properly before you can move on or let go and that’s not something anyone can deny. If you just lock those negative emotions inside, you’re never going to be able to truly heal or find yourself in the ways that you need to.
Below I am going to go over some of the more prominent stages of grief and some of the things that come with those different stages. Being aware of these stages can help you to better understand where you are in the things you’re facing. I know, it’s hard but you can get through whatever it is you’re facing.
8 Stages Of Grief:
1. Denial Of The Truth
When someone passes or something bad happens we often end up feeling as if what has happened cannot be real. We question whether or not where just dreaming or having a nightmare and we wake each morning thinking that things are going to go back to normal but they just don’t. We deny the truth in an effort to save ourselves from the pain but it just doesn’t work.
2. Release/Lashing Out
After we finally realize that what we are facing is actually real, things hit us in waves. It’s like a huge shock and well, anger or intense emotion washes over us. We are torn apart inside and there isn’t much we can do at this stage to get things under control. A lot of people are not willing to see this but honestly, the more you let out during this stage the better.
3. Rage Within
Once you’ve gotten through the initial outburst of emotions you’re going to feel a lot of anger. You’re going to want to change things and be pissed that you can’t. Nothing you do now will make any real difference and that’s going to leave you feeling quite helpless overall as time passes.
Once someone reaches this stage things take a dark turn. You find yourself trying all you can to make things right even when there is nothing you can do. We cannot bring people back and we cannot change the past. While you might want things to be different more than anything in the world, this is not something you can just fix.
5. Depression/Negative Emotions Flooding
Being unable to do anything about the situation before you leaves you feeling very hopeless. You want to do something so bad and you’re at a loss for how to move forth. You’re drowning in negative emotions and depression overall depending on how hard this specific thing has hit you and finding the light at the end of the tunnel is no easy task from here.
6. Obsessing Over The Past
From here a lot of us end up obsessing over the past. While we need to let it sink in that we cannot change the past, we spend far too much time thinking of things we never said that we should have and actions that we should have taken to really make sure things were as they should have been. You come up with words you’ll never get the chance to say and well, that can leave you feeling quite broken inside.
There will however come a point where you accept that this situation is not changeable and that the grief you’re feeling is important to process. You let the loss sink in and it really rocks you to your core. Sure, you’re still upset and working on things but you’re functioning a lot more properly now.
8. Moving On
Of course, the pain from the loss you’re feeling won’t just go away and it will always be with you on some level but after a while moving on is possible. You begin to see life in a more positive light and you start working on getting back to normal. This could take just a few weeks or it could take you years, that is up to you and varies from person to person. That being said, this doesn’t mean everything is suddenly fine, you’ll still miss the person who left this world or miss the opportunities that are no longer before you. Yes, things have changed but you’re still grieving even if you think you’re finally finished.
To learn more about grief take a look at the video below. This kind of thing is normal and we all experience it. Don’t be afraid to reach out if you’re struggling.