Just because something is working for someone you know does not mean it’s going to work for you. People-pleasing isn’t going to make you feel better about yourself and the sooner you realize that the better.
Instead of letting someone walk all over you, hold your own. Don’t obsess over the happiness of others when you’re not concerned about your own. Your happiness matters more than that of others when you’re looking at things on a personal level. Sure, other people deserve to be happy as well but not at your expense.
The harder you try to be the person everyone else wants you to be the less content and happy you will be as a whole. True happiness only comes from within. You cannot find it by turning yourself into someone you’re not. Below I am going to go over some of the reasons why people-pleasing overall is a terrible idea, don’t be afraid to let these reasons sink in.
10 Reasons Why You Should Stop Trying To Please Everyone:
1. You are not actually responsible for the feelings of others.
Just because you feel responsible for the feelings of others does not mean you are. You need to put yourself first and make sure you’re taking care of your own wants and needs before those of other people. Sure, you might not like it when people are mad or upset in regards to you but it’s just a part of life you’ve got to face.
2. The faker you are the less you’ll be able to please anyone anyway.
When you try to change who you are to fit in with other people you become quite fake. The faker you are the less people will want to be around you. They can tell that you’re trying too hard and it becomes quite apparent that you’re not actually into the things you’re saying you’re into.
3. Working to please everyone takes a serious toll on your self-esteem.
The more you try to make everyone else happy and excited to see you the less you’re going to recognize yourself. People-pleasing takes a serious toll on the self-esteem of those who fall into its trap. You should be building yourself up and not worrying about the thoughts of others.
4. When you’re ‘people-pleasing’ you’re not making authentic connections.
The more you try to make everyone else happy the more frustrated you’re going to become. Instead of making proper authentic connections you’re going to have a ton of fake friends and be wasting your time. Wouldn’t you rather have three real friends instead of five fake ones?
5. You’re giving too much power to the opinions of others when people-pleasing.
The more you let other people control how you feel the worse you’re going to end up. Your opinion of yourself should be the only one that matters to you. Sure, the people around you should be able to provide you with their input but you should also be capable of telling them to shove it.
6. You cannot please everyone, period.
This life is short and you shouldn’t waste it trying to please everyone around you. You cannot please everyone and trying to is a waste of time. In the end, there will always be people who just don’t and won’t like you.
7. People-pleasing is more or less a burden and not something you enjoy.
The more you people-please the more clear it will become how much of a burden it is. You have to keep up with so much and never have time for yourself. You become someone that you might not recognize as time passes.
8. The more willing you are to change for others the more clear it is you need serious self-love.
As you continue to work so hard for others you stop loving yourself. You become a version of yourself that is nothing like the real you and it becomes hard to figure out where the lines end. Just how much of you are you willing to lose?
9. The more you try to please others the more you lose sight of who you are.
People-pleasing, as noted above, makes you lose yourself. The more you put into it the worse you’re going to feel. Instead of feeding your soul, you’re draining it.
10. Trying to please everyone is a serious waste of energy.
Other people should not be able to bring you down in the way you allow them to. Giving them this power over you is a waste of your energy and your time. They’re just going to leave you feeling worse than before and you don’t deserve that at all.