We might love our partner, but is marriage really the right move? While love is a big part of moving forward, is it enough to get you through properly, or is there too much lacking in other areas?
When it comes to jumping to get married, you need to think things through. If you’re not ready or your partner isn’t the match you think he or she is, you might end up seriously regretting having committed in this way, to begin with. Divorce can be quite frustrating and really leave both or one of the two involved in serious trouble, would it even be an option for you in the future?
Below, I am going to go over some of the signs that perhaps you shouldn’t be trying for marriage with your lover. While you’re dating and perhaps content in some ways, you need to make sure you’re both ready to get married before even seriously talking about that kind of thing. Moving forward in any way when you’re in a relationship should be mutual and everyone should be as comfortable as possible. Don’t jump the gun if you aren’t sure of yourself, and don’t force your lover into that situation either.
20 Signs You Should NOT Marry The Person You’re Seeing:
1. Your partner doesn’t seem to like the idea of getting married.
If your partner isn’t interested just yet, don’t push him or her into it. This will result in them feeling forced and everything falling apart sooner or later. Sure, they might give in, but are they doing-so for the right reasons or just to make you happy? For those contemplating the complexities of marriage and love, “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts” by Gary Chapman offers insights into understanding and communicating love effectively, making it a valuable guide for couples considering a deeper commitment.
2. You’re unable to show your partner your vulnerable side.
If you and your partner cannot show one another your truest selves and share your vulnerable moments, you’re wasting your time being together. You should strive to be with someone who is there for you properly. You need to be able to share your worst moments with your lover and allow him/her to help you get through it.
3. Your partner is toxic to you.
If your partner is toxic to you in any way, you should not marry them. You should actually, in this case, do the opposite. Leaving the relationship will do you much more good than you might realize. For individuals grappling with the decision of whether to marry, especially when facing doubts and insecurities, “Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In or Get Out of Your Relationship” by Mira Kirshenbaum provides a framework for making this critical decision, offering clarity and direction during uncertain times.
4. You don’t feel like you’re both on the same level.
If you feel like your partner is better than you or vice versa, you should not be getting married. You need to know your worth before moving forward. Everyone is equally important, point-blank.
5. Your intuition is telling you not to get married.
If you feel like getting married is not something you want, don’t do it. You don’t have to force yourself into things, either. You are a human being, and you are capable of saying no.
6. Someone has been unfaithful.
If someone within this relationship has been unfaithful, getting married isn’t the right move. This will only make things worse and leave both of you feeling like it was the only option. You don’t have to dive into things without allowing healing and proper growth of trust, give both of yourselves time.
Well, if you’ve been a “good” girl who’s feeling that crazy
itch to be just a LITTLE bit naughty, you have to go watch
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7. You’re pushing your loved ones away for the relationship.
If you are pushing away the people who matter the most to you for this relationship, it might not be worth staying in. Ask yourself why this is happening and think things over. Sometimes we’re not with who we think we are with.
8. Neither of you is good at communicating properly.
If you and your partner are able to communicate properly and really talk your issues out, you shouldn’t be making the move to get married. Everyone needs to be able to sit down and talk calmly about the issues within the relationship. You are both going to have to do this time and time again as the days pass.
9. You cannot trust one another.
Trust is not compromisable, and you shouldn’t feel forced to compromise on it, period. If there is no trust, there is no real connection. Make sure you’re both on the same page when it comes to this.
10. You think getting married will fix all your problems.
Getting married won’t fix you or your partner. This will not make all your problems go away. You cannot just push the past out of the picture, sorry. “The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values, and Spiritual Growth” by M. Scott Peck explores the nature of loving relationships and the path to personal development, making it a meaningful read for individuals seeking to understand the complexities of relationships and self-improvement.
11. You’re only considering it for the sake of not being alone.
Getting married won’t make you feel less alone. If you’re diving into this because you don’t want to risk being single, you need to take a step back. There are better ways to go about this kind of thing.
12. Your partner still does things that make you feel very insecure.
If your partner knows your insecurities and still uses them against you, then you’re not with someone you should be getting married to. You should be getting married to someone who builds you up not someone who tears you down. Love shouldn’t be so painful.
13. You feel on edge more than not.
In your relationship, you should feel safe and comfortable. You shouldn’t feel like the world is against you or like you’re walking on eggshells. Find someone who is going to be there for you in the ways you need them to be.
14. You’re always having to make excuses for his or her bad behaviors.
If you are constantly having to make excuses for your partner and the things he or she says and does you need to question the prevalence of marriage between the two of you. Do you want to deal with this forever? Should you wait and see if things change first? Don’t be scared to stand up for yourself.
15. You don’t know much about one another.
If you aren’t able to get to know one another properly, you shouldn’t be getting married. You and your partner need to get to know each other on all possible levels before diving into the world of marriage. While it is ‘just a piece of paper’ it is also a very hard piece of paper to get out of and away from.
16. One or both parts of the relationship need to work on their anger/emotional issues.
If you and your lover are not able to properly function within and lash out frequently, you need to work on that before anything else. Everyone should be mature and focused when it comes to moving towards getting married. You need to be able to put the negatives aside within reason.
17. You haven’t been together for very long.
If you and your partner are still very new in love, you should not be getting married. Don’t rush things, give yourself time to date, and be comfortable in finding out new things about one another above all else. You don’t have to get married to be happy, slow down.
18. You do not feel like everyone’s needs are being met properly.
If the needs of those inside of the relationship are not being met, there is no sense in moving forward. Everyone needs to be taken care of in all possible ways, period. This is not negotiable.
19. You do not feel respected.
Respect is also not something that can be negotiated. If your lover isn’t able to respect you and your boundaries, you should not be with them at all. You are not a toy.
20. You feel like a possession rather than a true partner.
You are not a possession, you are a person, and you deserve to be taken seriously. If your lover is always telling you what to do and putting you down, you need to move on. Marriage is not always going to be for every single couple, and you shouldn’t be upset in knowing that. You might be on the way to finding someone who is well worth your time, wait and see.
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P.S. The reason so many men “pull away” from women is because
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