For those who do not know, unloved daughters are basically the daughters of what we consider narcissistic mothers. These girls grow up feeling as if they are objects instead of children and their mothers do not nurture them in the ways that they truly need them to.
They have wounded souls whether they realize it or not. The way their mother’s treated them affected their lives in a big way and will continue to do so until they pass on. Working through this kind of thing once realized takes a lot and can require therapy. You see, these daughters don’t know why their mothers are refusing to connect with them and they begin thinking something is wrong with them. They see other people connecting with their mothers in different ways and they want that even though they know they aren’t going to be able to have it.
Those of us who are unloved daughters fall for narcissists time and time again because of their charm. They rope us in and give us exactly what we want and what we have been craving. We tend to be needy and to be honest, as we are used to being manipulated. We find someone who is willing to tell us exactly what we want to hear and before we know it we are head over heels in love.
We mistake their games for passion and we don’t notice how verbally and emotionally abusive they are being because we are already so used to it. We just tune it out and continue on. When you are what one would deem an unloved daughter you know exactly what it’s like to be put down every day. You work so hard and never receive any praise for it. Narcissists prey on people like this.
Narcissists are attracted to unloved daughters because they see them as easy targets. The more closed off and anxious you are the more attracted to you they will be. They want you to let them inch their way in so that they can get you right where they want you. They know you will focus more on the positive aspects of the relationship than other people would. They know that unloved daughters aren’t as good at seeing the bad side of things.
Because unloved daughters are so ready for something special they put their all into people who do not deserve them. They do their best to fill the hole that was dug in their heart by their own mothers. They take the kind words of the narcissist and the warmth of his lips as so much more than it is.
Unloved daughters set themselves up for heartbreak time and time again. This is one of the most devastating realities to face. However, if you are an unloved daughter don’t give up, you can find real love and you can be with someone who is not a narcissist. You deserve all that you are willing to give in return and you should never settle. If you really want to, you can work towards healing the pain you feel inside.
Image via The Power of Silence