Toxic people can be quite confusing at times and this isn’t without reason. They do their best to leave their victims questioning themselves and others in a way that gives them more control.
Whether the toxic person you’ve faced or are facing was or is a friend, family member, or romantic partner chances are they’ve managed to do some real damage. Toxic people are extremely manipulative, and they know how to get things done in the way that they see fit. Through allowing them a presence in our lives we are putting ourselves at risk of some pretty rough things and ultimately damaging our own minds as a result.
Below I am going to go over some of the things that toxic people do to keep their victims in check and how they work to keep them quiet about the things they’re going through or having done to them. Some of these you may already be aware of but others may come as a surprise.
12 Things Toxic People Will Always Use To Try and Silence Their Victims:
1. They use their words to tear you down.
Toxic people want you to feel like there is something wrong with you so they do their best to make you feel as though you are not good enough to be around them. They will call you names and make fun of you in ways that leave you wondering why they even stick around. While you might be very smart they will call you dumb and while you are very pretty they will find something to call you ugly over.
2. They withhold affection.
They go out of their way to make sure you’re feeling as if they’re closing themselves off. They want you to come to them and beg them for attention. The more you want their presence the less of it you will find they’re willing to offer.
3. They use your weaknesses against you.
Toxic people are very quick to bring up the things you know are your weaknesses. For instance, if you are insecure about something they will make sure to mention it when trying to get you to do something for them. It’s like every little thing you mention to them in confidence is something they can turn around to make benefit themselves in some form.
4. They make you question your reality.
They don’t want you to think that you are right or that the things you’re thinking are correct in any sense of the word. They will lie to you and even with proof not own up to the things they have done. The more confused you are the more control they can gain over you and your life.
5. They project their flaws onto you.
Toxic people love projecting. They do this without realizing it but it benefits them greatly. They will call you out for things they’re doing and make you feel like the bad person in any situation.
6. They do their best to make your decisions for you.
They don’t want you to be in control of your own life. They see you as an extension of themselves and so controlling you is important to them. They will try hard to force you into situation you otherwise would avoid.
7. They blame you for things you cannot control.
Toxic people are always blaming others for their own wrongdoings. While you might have no control over something that will not stop them from bringing the blame to your front door. You just either have to take it or break things off and cut ties to get away from it, there is no in-between.
8. They love bomb you and leave you wondering what is going on.
They will sometimes when they feel you trying to leave or grow distant love bomb. This is them finally giving you exactly what you’ve wanted from them all along but it won’t last. You will think they’re trying or changing but that is nowhere near what is actually happening.
9. They take everything you say or do out of context.
The things you say and do around them are taken out of context and used against you. For instance, if you say you might come to visit them they will make it out as though you said you would and when you don’t make you feel so guilty that you have to visit in your own mind. This is not okay and you should not be allowing it to happen within your life.
10. They make subtle threats.
Toxic people might not always be outright threatening, but they will make threats. They may act as though they’re going to do something to themselves or even just make it seem as though they’re capable of bringing you down. For instance, if you’re trying hard at work they may mention how it would be a shame of you lost your job all the while being good friends with your boss.
11. They test your boundaries and refuse to respect them.
They will always be working to cross your boundaries and never stopping to take your feelings into consideration. The more you allow them to do this the more prevalent it will become. Eventually, they will not think twice about the things they’re doing to you.
12. They ‘joke’ about things they know get under your skin.
Toxic people will joke about things that they know bother you and then when you mention it or act sad about it they will claim they were just joking. That being said, they were not just joking and on a deeper level, you know that. Letting them win is not something you should do. You are no toy and you should not be treated as such.
Sources:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/projection