Being a parent is a stressful job, there is no doubt about that. There is never a shortage of things to do, so to say it gets stressful is an understatement.
None of us are perfect, that much is true. Sometimes, the struggles of parenting can be a bit overwhelming, and there will be times when you just want to scream. The thing is, doing this will only hinder you and your children for numerous reasons. Screaming is not only ineffective, but it can actually be damaging. if you are wanting to become a scream-free mom, here are 6 steps to take.
1. Educate yourself on the dangers of screaming at your kids.
Screaming and yelling at your kids is a form of manipulation. Additionally, it is emotionally and psychologically damaging, in a myriad of ways. Before you get started, or really, as your first step, do some research on why you shouldn’t scream at your kids. I assure you, it will make you want to change your ways.
2. Understand your triggers.
If you are triggered when your child yells at you, recognize this. Plan ahead for these triggers and how to respond without screaming. It might be helpful to ask for the help of your partner, for a different perspective.
3. Have consequences set in place beforehand.
Sit down and write out the rules and the things that your child is not allowed to do. In your mind, have set consequences for those actions. Now, instead of yelling, follow the next steps.
4. Give one warning.
Give one verbal warning in a cool, calm, and collected voice. Do not raise your voice. Do not go off plan. If your child does not listen to the warning go to the next step.
5. ALWAYS follow through.
FOLLOW through with your consequences. Do not back off from them, do not yell. Consistency is what is going to make all the difference in the world.
6. Take a step back when it gets too much.
If you feel like you are going to lose control, step away. Go to the bathroom. Walk outside. Make a call. Do anything to allow you a moment to ‘woo-sah.’