While it might seem fun to be needy, depending on the situation it can get you in some deep murky waters. Going into a new relationship, being needy is almost never ideal and could be ruining things for you before they’ve actually begun.
Being clingy is okay sometimes but most people are not interested in being forced to drag their significant other around as if he or she is unable to function without them. Neediness comes in a wide variety and can be derived on both sides. We have most likely all been guilty of being a bit too reliant on our lovers but the more aware we are of this the easier it can be to work against it.
12 Signs You’re Being Needy:
1. You hate not being included even when its a situation that doesn’t suit you properly.
Even when you’re unable to go out with them you still make a big deal out of it. You could already have plans and for some reason find a way to throw a fit once he or she decides on something to do. It’s like living separate lives in your mind is impossible.
2. You base your happiness on this person being in your life.
When we are in a relationship we do get a lot of our happiness from our partner but our happiness in itself should not rely on them. You are unable to be happy without this person and it’s a big problem. You need to understand that happiness is not something you can continue to find in other people.
3. You are always seeking validation from them.
When it comes to opinions his/hers is the only one that matters. You’re always fishing for compliments and going out of your way to try and impress. This makes you come across as very fake and in many ways ‘trying too hard.’ Just be more of your true self.
4. You text him/her all the time even when they’re busy.
You are always blowing up your partner’s phone even if you’ve only been together for a little while it’s like you cannot talk to anyone else. When he or she is at work there is no sense in texting him/her every ten minutes. Learning how to be apart is important.
5. You get jealous when he or she does things without you.
You have a deep seeded need to be included. When he or she goes out without you it grinds your gears more than anything else. This comes from a place of great insecurity and is hard to come to terms with. That being said, it can seriously make or break a relationship.
6. You are blinded by love.
You are so obsessed with this person that anything they say or do is fine. You have turned into someone you aren’t to better fit with who they are in general. In your eyes, they cannot do any wrong.
7. You try to make them spend all their time with you.
You are so controlling that you do all you can to ensure your partner spends time with you and only you for the most part. You hate being away from him or her and are too dependent on him/her for a lot of things. This is very unhealthy and needs to change.
8. You have made yourself too available.
You never make plans with anyone other than your lover because you don’t want to see anyone else and you don’t want to be busy ‘just in case.’ This leaves you waiting around a lot and with nothing to do. There is nothing wrong with going out and having fun with your friends without your partner. You are your own person.
9. You’re overly invested already.
You’ve already made this person into your whole world whether you’ve been together for a short period of time or a long period of time. You’re investing more of yourself than you should be and giving far more than intended. This is also a seriously unhealthy issue that needs to be worked through.
10. You are more than willing to call time and time again until you get an answer even if he/she is busy.
When he or she says that they will call and doesn’t you blow up their phone. This is obsessive and scary. A call or two is fine but don’t go overboard. Know your limits and stick within them.
11. The ‘neediness’ is one-sided.
If you’re needy in all the ways listed above and your partner isn’t, you need to accept that this is one-sided. You’re probably at this point really driving him/her away and need to stop before it’s too late. How many times has he or she said that you needed to ‘get a life’ and did you take it to heart?
12. You cannot fathom the thought of a life without them already.
You are so invested that life without this person is something you could never even think about. You need to take a step back and realize that the world does not revolve around your relationship and that there are other fish in the sea whether you’re interested in them or not. Love isn’t always going to be present in every single relationship you find yourself in and you need to know when to cut ties.
Now, if you find yourself partaking in the things listed above and you want to work through your neediness you should take a peek at the video below. It will go over how to combat these things and cover moving forward properly. You can save your relationship if you really want to but it will take a lot of effort.