Gaslighting is far more common in this day and age than it should be and sadly, most think dealing with it is ‘normal.’ Gaslighting comes in so many forms and can be from someone related to you, a friend, or even your own lover.
For those who may not be aware, gaslighting is a form of harm that can be both emotional and psychological. It consists of basically working to control someone in your life by changing the way they see themselves and their reality as a whole. Those who gaslight others use many manipulation tactics to accomplish their goal and leave the person they’re gaslighting in denial and struggling to grasp the world around them.
Below, I am going to go over some of the more prominent signs that you may be experiencing gaslighting within some kind of relationship you have. These signs should not be overlooked or ignored. They are red flags and should indicate that getting out is your best option. Cutting ties with those who are trying to control you is always the best option when it comes to this kind of thing, regardless of who the person working to gaslight you is.
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12 Signs You’re Being Gaslighted:
1. You are constantly being blamed for things you cannot control.
When you’re stuck by the side of someone who is gaslighting you chances are they will constantly find ways to make things out to be your fault. No matter what it is that has gone wrong or why it always somehow is your doing even when it’s not. You cannot control the world and bad things happen sometimes, your manipulator just won’t ever take responsibility for his or her actions.
2. The person manipulating you is always building you up just to tear you down.
Being around someone who is gaslighting you is like being around someone who cannot make up his or her mind. They will always be building you up and breaking you down. Nothing you do is ever good enough.
3. You are closed off from the people who matter most.
Gaslighters tend to close their victims off from the rest of the world. They make sure those who care about you cannot get to you or change their opinions of you. This is how they get more control, the less support you have, the longer they can keep you around.
4. You hear the phrase ‘you’re crazy’ more than you can count.
Gaslighters love to call their victims crazy. The more crazy you feel, the better they can control you. To them, you are nothing more than a pawn.
5. You feel confused more often than not.
The more confused you are the better. Your manipulator wants you to question everything and wants you to wonder what you’re doing wrong, even when you’ve done nothing wrong. Through this, they are able to force you to do things that you otherwise would never do.
6. You feel hopeless and lost.
As time passes and this kind of thing progresses you will end up feeling as though there are no options for you. You will close yourself off more and more and become quite lost in this situation as a whole. Nothing feels right, but you don’t know how to change it.
7. You are always told you’re too sensitive.
Your manipulator will use your own emotions against you. Everything you say or do is fuel for his or her fire. When you react appropriately to their behavior they will make you out to be overreacting.
8. You are unable to get through to the person who is manipulating you.
The more you try to work through these problems, the less your manipulator is willing to hear. He or she shuts you down time and time again. It’s like he or she just doesn’t want to change or hear what you have to say, period.
9. You’re always walking on eggshells.
You feel more at peace when your manipulator is not around. When he or she is near, it’s as if you’re walking on eggshells. You never know who is coming home to you, and it can be quite heartbreaking in itself.
10. You’re constantly questioning yourself.
The more time you spend dealing with this person the more you question yourself. What are you doing wrong, and how do you fix things? Could you really be causing all of these issues? How can moving forward be possible?
11. You are constantly being lied to.
Your manipulator won’t give you the truth often because the more he or she can get by you, the more control he or she has. Everything that this person has to do with comes down to control. You might catch them in a lie, but they will turn things around and make you feel bad for questioning them, to begin with.
12. You do not make your own decisions.
If you do not make the decisions in your life, you are being gaslighted, point-blank. Your life is yours to live, and you should not be doing things you do not want to do. Sure, times can be rough here and there, but you should be in charge of your own decisions. Other people should not be choosing the life you live.
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