Toxic mothers are some of the most frustrating people to deal with. They do all they can to control those around them and from a young age train them to give into her regardless of the situation.
If you grew up with a toxic mother, you know how damning they are in the ways that they treat their children. When it comes to having a toxic mother you most likely struggle with upsetting her and are always doing your best to make her happy and meet her unrealistic expectations. Whether she’s trying to hold you back or abusing her power over you entirely, you are most likely at a loss when it comes to ‘what’ to do.
Below I am going to go over some of the more common things toxic mothers do when it comes to controlling their offspring. If you see these things happening within your relationship with your mom, you might be facing toxicity without realizing it. This kind of thing is something we can work to overcome and should never allow to persist once addressed.
10 Things Toxic Mother’s Are Known For Doing:
Sadly when it comes to toxic mothers, a lot of the time they target one child to be the victim of their cruel jokes and treat the rest well. It’s like they pick favorites and are unwilling to really go the extra mile for that one child. This really sucks and hurts when you turn out to be the one who is being targeted for existing.
2. Toxic mothers gaslight their children, big time.
A lot of the time when it comes to toxic mothers they will turn their children into their slaves, this meaning they teach them that she does no wrong and is never wrong. She will call them crazy when they question her and make them feel terrible for doing-so at all. This ensures she is more in control and leaves them losing their sense of self.
3. Toxic mothers are never wrong in their own eyes.
When you’re dealing with a toxic mother you should be aware that she is ‘never wrong.’ No matter what happens or how you address the issue at hand she will never admit fault. You will never get any kind of apology from her, and it is always ‘my way or the highway.’
4. Toxic mothers refuse to change their minds, ever.
Toxic mothers are usually a lot less willing to change their minds. They say one thing and are always set in that no matter what. When you try to converse with her she closes herself off and shuts down.
5. Toxic mothers compare their children to others quite often.
A lot of the time toxic mothers will compare one child to the rest and to other people’s children. They will make them feel bad for the things they’re doing and always complaining. It’s like they are unable to realize that their kids are never able to live up to her expectations.
Sometimes toxic mothers can be quite frustrating. The harder you try the less they seem content. It’s like nothing is ever good enough and no matter what they will never be happy. You could be doing exactly what they want, and they still would find something to complain about.
7. Toxic mothers usually leave you feeling upset when it comes to opening up.
Whenever you talk to a toxic mother you end up feeling quite irritated and sad. She is always judging you and never accepts you for who you are. It’s like the more you want to be yourself the less she is willing to accept you.
8. Toxic mothers hide their aggression and are great at pretending it isn’t there.
Toxic mothers are often quite a lot more aggressive than you realize. They attack rather than stopping to think things through and are not often willing to really address anything without anger. They always want to jump into being aggressive and are never willing to stop and sit down to relax properly. Regardless of what you’re saying to her she always adds her attitude to her response.
9. Toxic mothers are always pulling the guilt-trip.
Toxic mothers will always pull the guilt-trip to make you do the things they want you to do. If you don’t do exactly what they want they bring guilt into it. They try to make you feel bad for existing in general and that is never okay.
10. Toxic mothers try too hard to be their kids ‘best friends.’
Toxic mothers are sometimes often a lot closer to their kids than they should be, and they just don’t separate their connection properly. You’re not a friend, you’re a mom and there needs to be separation present. Sure, you can be supportive and close but there need to be lines drawn and boundaries set.