There is no clear set in stone way to be a ‘good’ parent. We all make mistakes and screw-up along the way no matter how hard we try to get everything right.
Parenting can be emotionally frustrating at time, but in the end, the rewards outweigh the moments of grief. Some of the most common parenting mistakes are much easier to deal with than others but they should all be faced properly.
Below I am going to go over some of these common mistakes and how they can affect our children. Children are much more impressionable than most people think. Just because something doesn’t seem like much to you doesn’t mean it won’t affect them in a big way.
The 12 Most Common Parenting Mistakes:
1. Not providing for them properly.
Children need shelter, food, clothes, and so forth. Not providing for their needs is one of the biggest mistakes you can make as a parent. This is neglect and should not be happening. We have to make sure they are able to have what they need.
2. Letting them constantly push the limits.
Children should not be pushing your limits. When you say no it should mean no. Giving in constantly is not going to do them any good. Letting them push the limits will really turn them into brats.
We have to set boundaries with our children. If we allow them to constantly overstep or we are constantly overstepping in different ways it is not going to do anyone any good. Setting real boundaries really need to happen with all parent/child relationship. If you do not set boundaries they will become either too close with your or not close enough
We should never invalidate our children’s emotions. Even during moments where you cannot understand their reactions or emotions, you need to remember that something has caused them to feel this way. Their emotions are their own and they are humans. You don’t want to hold them back when it comes to emotional development.
When you compare your children to other people, you are making them feel ‘less than.’ Your kids might not be ‘as perfect’ as your neighbors’ kids but that doesn’t mean you should bring attention to it. This can really mess with their self-esteem.
6. Overly criticizing them all the time.
Criticizing your kids on occasion is fine but doing it all the time will really make them feel bad. We don’t like being criticized, so why would they? They have feelings and we should be paying attention to those feelings.
7. Bullying them without realizing it.
Sometimes we end up bullying our children when we don’t even truly realize it. They are much more impressionable than you’d think. The closer attention you pay to them, the more you will notice the effects of this kind of thing.
8. Ignoring their emotional needs.
If you ignore your children’s emotional needs they will begin to think they are not supposed to express their emotions at all. They will begin bottling and hurt their emotional development in the long run. While you might think that them being a bit closed off isn’t an issue it will be.
9. Being inconsistent with them.
If you are being inconsistent with your kids you will force them into growing up too quickly. They will learn to rely on themselves more and rely on you less. Sure, you might not think that them being independent is a bad thing but if they are jumping into it too quickly it could be.
Your kids are people too, if you are a control freak and try to be in charge of all aspects of their lives things won’t work out well. They will end up feeling like they cannot be themselves. You will squash their creativity.
11. Being a really bad role model for them.
Being a bad role model for your kids is a lot easier than you think. You really need to watch the things you say and do. Children can and do pick up on some of the worst things.
12. Enabling bad behaviors or waiting on them hand and foot.
When it comes to bad behavior, we should not be enabling. If your kids are being waited on hand and foot or allowed to run all over you, changes need to be made. The longer you let this go on, the more bratty they will become and that is not a good thing at all.
Image via The Powerful Mind