As a man who has made plenty of mistakes in my day, the one I regret the most was taking good women who would have been there for me through it all for granted. Yes, I said women… this is something I have done more than once and am still upset over them to this day.
This is a warning, for anyone who doesn’t think that their significant other is going to leave them for taking them for granted. Eventually, she will leave. For me, it started with a girl named Tammy who I supplied with endless broken promises. To begin with, I didn’t really think falling for a girl like that would be my style, but I quickly learned that I loved everything about her, especially how her eyes lit up when she said my name. She didn’t know what I was going to do to her and honestly, at that point in my life neither did I.
I let her get close and we were easily the best couple around, but I betrayed her time and time again, once I got comfortable everything went to shit. I was just a boy and I didn’t realize how badly I was hurting her, well, actually to be honest… I did. I knew I was breaking her heart and I didn’t care. I was cold and selfish and I just wanted to have the best of both worlds. For a while I did, as she stuck around and I continued playing games with her mind, her heart, and tearing her apart emotionally.
I was a piece of shit, I was a horrible person and I ruined that beautiful girl. She finally found her inner light and a strength I thought was not there and she left me. She cut contact and even when I showed up at her house begging for her to come back like she had so many times before, she turned me away once and for all. She went on to become an even more amazing person and yes I still had not learned my lesson.
Tammy was not the only girl I treated this way when I was in younger. It was as if ‘dating as many girls as you could’ was a right of passage and so I did. I had plenty of opportunities back then to fall in love and create a life with an amazing woman but I never did. I never gave anyone the chance that they deserved and that is my fault.
Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate women now and am not the person that I once was, but it took a lot of soul searching to gain the understanding that I have now. For a very long time, I was a boy walking around as a man wasting everyone’s time. While Tammy was my first real girlfriend, the one that really changed me was Chelsie. Chelsie was a fireball, she had her whole life planned out and she still loved to have fun.
Chelsie was everything I ever wanted in a woman and we hit it off quickly. I am pretty sure that I fell for her long before she fell for me, yet once again when we got comfortable things went downhill. I know it takes two to ruin a relationship and I didn’t cheat on herm if that’s what you’re thinking, I just stopped caring. I didn’t do anything to show her that I wanted her. I made her feel alone in her own home and I really took a lot of my frustrations out on her without realizing it.
She and I tried to work things out a few times, but I wasn’t putting forth the effort that I should have been. When I finally realized what needed to be done she was already headed out the door and nothing I could have said would have changed that. Women are not toys and we shouldn’t treat them as such. Everyone has emotions and everyone wants to feel needed. In order for a relationship to work everyone needs to be putting forth the same amount of effort.
I would give anything in the world to have Chelsie walk back through that door, but I know she won’t and I know that no matter how many times I apologize or say that I will do better, she will not believe me. Be thankful for what you have while you have it, never stop treating your lover right. Don’t make the same mistakes that I did.