Sometimes we go through things in life that change us, and for many, these changes include building walls around our hearts.

While these walls are very real they are not impossible to break down. If you love someone with a guarded heart you need to know the following things before getting in too deep. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean the relationship is going to be easy.

27 Things You Need to Know About Loving Someone With A ‘Guarded Heart’:

1. You must be patient.

She is not going to fall head over heels for you in one night. You have to be patient if you want to win her over. She is not someone you can sway with ease.

2. She knows how dangerous love is.

She is all too familiar with the bullshit that comes with love in itself. She is a great lover, but also one that tends to be a bit reserved. You have to get used to this.

3. She is not going to be quick to show emotion.

She is not going to show you her vulnerable side easily! You just have to be patient, but it will pay off in the end. The longer you stick around the more she will reveal.

4. You will not be able to win her over with material things.

If you try to sweep her off of her feet she will simply cut contact. She is not someone who can be swayed. You have to win her over in other ways.

5. She does not owe you anything.

If she decides she doesn’t want to pursue a relationship you have to accept that. Not every woman with a guarded heart is able to love again. Sure, they may want to, but it just is not in them anymore.

6. She does not need you.

She doesn’t need you or anyone else. She is her own person and can do whatever she wants. Her life is not as empty as you think it is.

7. She respects your vulnerable side but is not going to let you know that right off the bat.

While you may not realize it she does appreciate you and respects you. She likes seeing your vulnerable side, but you wouldn’t know it from the beginning. Things will change as time passes.

8. She is more empathetic than she lets on.

She is empathetic on a level like no one else but she doesn’t express it as much as most do. She is good at holding things in. Bottling is her expertise.

9. She will be more impressed with kindness than flowers.

She is all about kindness and affection but not in an overwhelming manner. The more money you try to spend the more her guard will be up.

10. She appreciates your flaws.

She appreciates the flaws in everyone and everything. Flaws are what make us who we are, and she knows this all too well.

11. She gets jealous easily and can be hot-headed.

If you are with her then you are only with her. She is a jealous girlfriend who can be a bit hot-headed at times but it is worth it. You will appreciate her cooky moments when they happen even if they are a bit over the top.

12. She can be a bit crazy.

She has her crazy moments but who doesn’t? We all have a little crazy in us, she is just not afraid to let hers out. Be aware but do not be afraid.

13. You may never actually fully understand her.

You are most likely never going to completely ‘get’ her. While this is a bit frustrating it is again something you will have to learn to live with. If you can’t handle it you should get out before things get too serious.

14. Just because she isn’t completely open doesn’t mean she doesn’t care.

She is not going to be as open with you as you are with her, but it doesn’t mean she isn’t interested. She might care strongly for you and not quite show it. Eventually, you will know for sure.

15. She doesn’t like when things move too fast.

She is not about to let someone come in and try to ‘woo’ her. If you move too fast she will run. This is not something that will go over well.

16. She might run.

Whether things are going too fast or not she still may run. Now the question at this point is, is she worth chasing? For some, she may be and others she may not.

17. She will not tell you everything until she is comfortable.

She is not going to be opening up to you in the ways you do her until she is ready. You have to give her space. If you overwhelm her she isn’t going to ever get comfortable.

18. She will struggle to ask you for help when she needs it.

She is not going to come to you when she needs something. If you think she needs help offer it. If you never offer she will never ask.

19. She values her alone time and her freedom.

She is all about her freedom, so you will have to learn to give her some space. If you try to take her freedom away she isn’t going to end up liking you very much.

20. It takes a lot to earn her trust.

She is not someone who will trust you easily. You have to trust her and earn her trust as you go; eventually, you will get there.

21. She is very independent.

She likes to do things on her own. She pays her own bills and makes sure things go according to her plans. While there is room for compromise here and there you cannot change her.

22. She does not lie and will not put up with those who do.

She is not going to lie to you and she is not going to let you lie to her. If you lie to her she is going to cut you off, and you will never see her again. Don’t let this happen, why lie in the first place?

23. She will not put up with games.

She is not going to let you play games with her heart. If she notices you trying to throw her through a loop or force her to chase you she will cut you off. Things do not work that way with her.

24. She is stronger than you will ever know.

She is stronger than anyone you have ever known. She has been through so much more than you think and in some cases, she might not want to tell you about it. If she opens up do not judge.

25. She is not going to be like your past girlfriends.

She is different because she has been through a lot as stated above. This is no ordinary girl.

26. You cannot hold her down.

If you try to hold her down she will only go her own way. You cannot lock her in a cage away from the rest of the world. Holding her down doesn’t last long, and it isn’t a good idea.

27. She will set boundaries that you will have to respect.

If you don’t respect her boundaries she will stop wasting time on you. However, if you do respect her and allow things to progress slowly things will end up far better than expected. Just because she sets boundaries does not mean she isn’t interested.

If you can manage all of the things listed above then go for it. Love is love whether it takes a little while longer than you want it to or not. Do you love someone with a guarded heart?

(Photo by Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash)

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