Our happiness and success in life are largely based upon the connections that we make. Increasing your chances of meeting new people and developing friendships, an attractive personality can make a big difference in your life.

While there are many factors that can impact your ability to build meaningful relationships with the people around you, not all of them are under your control. You can, however, improve how attractive you appear to others. Making these changes in your life can boost your connection with your co-workers and increase your social circle.

Be more attractive to the people around you by doing these 13 things:

#1 – Allow yourself to live in the moment.

Far too often people spend their lives wrapped up in the past, worried about the ‘what ifs’ and the ‘could have beens’, or anxious about what is yet to come. This often leads to completely missing out on all the incredible things that are happening here and now. Instead, take a step back and open your eyes to the world around you. Learning to recognize the positive things in your life today will instantly make you a brighter light in the world, drawing others to you.

#2 – Never underestimate the power of a smile.

When you approach life with a genuine smile on your face, this tells others that you are a friendly and upbeat individual. It encourages others to want to talk to you, drawn in by your happiness, joy, and positivity. In a world that is often full of dark news and negativity, a simple smile can set you apart.

#3 – Show enthusiasm towards life.

Life isn’t always going to be easy. It can be messy, complicated, challenging and uncomfortable. Rather allowing this to tear you down or destroy your happiness, challenge yourself to tackle whatever is thrown your way with enthusiasm and excitement. Not only will this draw other people to want to be in your life, it will also improve your chances of success in life.

#4 – Believe in yourself and build your confidence.

Psychologists and relationship experts have long known that there is a direct link between confidence and attractiveness. People are drawn to those that walk into a room with their head held high, aware of their own self-worth. Confident people are seen as more trustworthy, reliable and successful. If you have been struggling with your confidence, there are steps you can take to improve it such as letting go of your past mistakes, improving your public speaking skills and investing a little into your appearance.

#5 – Avoid comparing yourself to others.

Comparison is an incredibly toxic influence in our lives. With the rise of social media, we are constantly bombarded with the happiest and most successful moments in the lives of those around us. This can lead us to view our lives in an incredibly negative light, destroying our confidence and robbing us of positivity. It may be difficult, but this is one habit that you need to eliminate from your life as soon as possible.

#6 – Free yourself from negative thoughts.

We often overlook the power that our thoughts have over lives. Negative thought patterns will, ultimately, hold you back and prevent you from finding joy and happiness in life. You don’t want to be the person that others avoid because you bring everyone down. Instead, banish this negative thinking from your mind, replacing it with positive ones. Its impact on your life may just surprise you!

#7 – Learn to value honesty but deliver it with respect.

One of the biggest mistakes that we make in life is to convince ourselves that it is okay to tell white lies in order to avoid upsetting people. The problem is that 9 times out of 10, people are going to find out the truth in time anyway. Instead, learn to value the importance of honesty. However, when delivering this truth, you want to be sure that you remain respectful and compassionate towards others. Honestly doesn’t give you license to be cruel.

#8 – Make eye contact with people around you.

When you are interacting with someone, make a point of making eye contact. Not only does this show that you are confident (see point #4), but it also shows the other person that you are truly engaged and interested in what they have to share. This can be incredibly uncomfortable at first, so it is a skill you will likely have to work on over time.

#9 – Pay attention to the non-verbal messages you are sharing.

Your facial expressions and body language may be telling people more than the words that you are speaking. Therefore, it is important to better understand what you are saying. Your posture can tell a lot about your level of confidence. For example, are you standing tall as you walk into a room, or are you hunched over? Are your arms crossed, creating a barrier between yourselves and others, closing yourself off to the world? You want to tell others that you are open, honest and trustworthy.

#10 – Avoid passing judgment on others.

When you direct negativity and judgment towards other people, the real message that you are sending to the people around you isn’t about the focus of your attention. Your choice to pass judgment reflects directly on you, and the image that it is giving isn’t a positive one! Try redirecting this focus so that you are building others up rather than tearing them down.

#11 – Pay attention to first impressions.

This point may appear slightly contradictory after reading the last point, but it’s important to know that everyone that we meet will judge us in the first tenth of a second. While this may seem completely unfair, understanding this can help you to improve how attractive you are to those around you. Pay attention to the way you are putting yourself out there – including your appearance. You want to be well groomed, positive, and (as we mentioned in point #2) never forget to smile!

#12 – Practice good listening skills.

If you really want to draw people in and give them a reason to want to keep you in your life, learn to practice good listening skills. Our society largely encourages us to be self-focused and egotistical, worried only about our own lives and the things that impact us directly. For this reason, on the rare occasion that someone shows genuine interest in us, it’s seen as highly attractive. Rather than just listening for the opportunity to put your own two cents in the conversation, step back and actually listen to what people are telling you.

#13 – Be kind and thoughtful towards others.

As I mentioned in the previous point, we live in an incredibly selfish society. Breaking free from this is as simple as putting your heart out there and showing kindness and compassion for the people that you meet. Take some time every day to show others that they are appreciated, seen and loved. A simple act of kindness can make a world of difference.

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