While many people may overlook the connection, anxiety and kindness are often closely linked. Anxiety is defined as an extreme level of worry or apprehension in relation to everyday situations.
Concerning themselves with the possible negative outcomes in any situation that they face for both themselves and the others around them, these individuals often experience panic attacks or high levels of stress. The root cause? Not only their own safety and well-being but that of others around them. They will literally work themselves into a panic over the well-being of other people.
Those who suffer anxiety are often people pleasers. Their number one concern in most situations is your happiness, and they won’t hesitate to sacrifice to make it happen. Wearing their heart on their sleeve, while still fearing the risks that someone might break it. They will move mountains for you and are far too often taken advantage of for their caring and compassion.
This way of thinking can be incredibly difficult for others to understand. If you love someone with these personality traits, you likely find yourself frustrated. We wonder why they would allow themselves to be put in the situations that they do, longing to protect them and teach them how to better protect themselves. The only way to begin to understand the choices that they make is to take a quick peek behind the curtains.
Here are 22 examples of the harsh reality of life for those who are anxious, but also too kind:
#1 – They focus their life on giving, often to the point of giving when they have nothing left to give.
They will give and give with no expectation of anything in return. In fact, they are so focused on giving to others that they often overlook their own care. Occasionally they need a reminder that you can’t pour from an empty cup.
#2 – They use paranoia as a means of protecting themselves.
If you find that their paranoia is getting on your last nerve, try to remind yourself that they are only acting out of self-preservation. This is their defense mechanism.
#3 – They often avoid sharing their opinion.
It isn’t that they don’t have an opinion on whatever topic you were recently discussing, however, they fear that saying anything short of agreeing with you 100% will result in hurting your feelings or offending you. Instead, they quietly agree and keep their opinion to themselves.
#4 – They love unconditionally.
They give love to everyone that they meet regardless of how they may be treated in return. Even those who take advantage of them are still met with love and affection.
#5 – They are terrified of being hurt.
If you ever notice that they seem hesitant or unsure for a brief moment, understand that they live every second of their lives truly terrified of being hurt. Rather than judging them, do what you can to help alleviate their fears – make them feel secure in your relationship.
#6 – They are always quick to apologize and admit fault.
If they have hurt you in some way, you can rest assured that they will be quick to take the steps to take responsibility for their actions. There is nothing that they fear more than knowing that they hurt someone else.
#7 – Occasionally they may even seem like they are over-apologizing.
They are so quick to apologize that it may even come across as fake at times, as they apologize more than you would expect from the average person. Rest assured, they are sincere, they are just incredibly hard on themselves.
#8 – They are extremely afraid of being abandoned.
Living their life afraid that everyone that they care for will eventually abandon them, they can sometimes come across as clingy or needy. If you fight it, it will only further enforce their fear. Try to understand where they are coming from.
#9 – They don’t use guilt as a tool.
While some people may use guilt as a tool, guilt tripping you in order to gain the upper hand, the very idea of this doesn’t even cross their mind. If they are confronting you about something that makes you feel guilty, they are 100% genuine with their concerns.
#10 – They can’t turn off their worrying nature.
They are worried about everything that can wrong with every decision that they make – all the time… There is no amount of logic or reasoning that is going to shut that off.
#11 – They often don’t abide by traditional boundaries and rules.
While the rest of the world is busy establish boundaries and rules of contract to avoid seeming needy or clingy in their relationships, such as the ever so popular ‘ 3-day rule,’ they pay no attention to these. Making their own social rules, they contact you as soon as they want and as often as they want, which is usually right away and often.
#12 – They will tolerate a bad date or an activity they hate for hours.
They may be completely miserable doing whatever they are currently doing, but the risk of upsetting or offending someone keeps them from speaking up and being honest. Instead, they slap on a smile and act like they are having the time of their life.
#13 – They can read you incredibly well, even if you are trying to hide your feelings.
These individuals are highly perceptive. While you may think you are keeping your thoughts, emotions, and feelings concealed, they continue to read you like a book.
#14 – They struggle to make any type of plans.
Whether you are talking about a party, a vacation or a decision as simple as what restaurant to grab dinner from, their anxiety and need to over analyze the world makes it nearly impossible to make any type of plans.
#15 – They worry about situations that may seem highly unlikely.
When they are experiencing extreme anxiety, you may try to talk them through their concerns only to find that they are unlikely or a little ‘ridiculous’ in your opinion. Understand that these fears are very real to them.
#16 – Often they will feel the need to over-prepare for these unlikely situations.
As unlikely as these fears previously mentioned may be, they will often take it a step further. Worried that they will be caught unprepared, they will purchase supplies or take precautionary steps for tragedies that will most likely never occur.
#17 – They don’t hesitate to forgive others.
If they are wronged by another they forgive incredibly easily, willingly giving a second chance to anyone who asks for it. This often ends up with them being hurt time and time again, but they don’t let it change their heart.
#18 – They will go to extreme lengths to avoid hurting anyone else.
They honestly fear nothing more than knowing that they are responsible for causing hurt or pain in the life of someone else. For this reason, they will take extreme precautions, often at the expense of their own well-being.
#19 – They are fiercely protective of those they care about.
Often perceived as weak, don’t underestimate the levels that they will go to in order to protect and care for the people that they care about. They are fiercely protective and won’t hesitate to step into battle for those that they love.
#20 – They analyze and over-analyze everything.
Due to the fact that they worry about every last possibility of how things could go wrong, they take the time to analyze and over-analyze every decision that they make. This is the only thing that gives them any sense of safety or security in their lives.
#21 – They are incredibly sensitive and highly emotional.
They don’t just feel emotions, they feel them intensely. It doesn’t matter if they are dealing with their own emotions or those of the people around them – they experience all feelings and pain deeply.
#22 – They have no interest in games or ‘power’.
While some people may make connections and feed relationships in an effort to obtain power and rise through the ranks in our society, this is of no interest to these individuals. They want real, genuine connections and nothing more.
Featured image via Master Minds